• Message In A Bottle •
Screenplay by Jonathan Carroll
about
What if someone invented a truth serum that was infallible? But what if the person who made it was a lunatic zealot like Osama Bin Laden who had a way of secretly giving it to everyone in the world, thus changing things into what he believed was THE way?
SCRIPT
EXT: STREET. NIGHT
In very slow motion, we see a bullet spinning through the air. It travels till it bursts through glass, pieces flying slowly everywhere. Glass scatters over a hand on an auto steering wheel. Hands shakes off glass, pushes open car door, MAN jumps out.
CUT TO:
EXT: STREET. NIGHT
Feet running. Camera moves up legs, body, to face of MAN (young, good looking) running hard. Constantly looks back over his shoulder: Someone is after him and he knows it.
CUT TO:
EXT: STREET. NIGHT
Two ferocious-looking dogs come flying around the corner, followed closely by two sets of men's legs.
CUT TO:
EXT: STREET. NIGHT
MAN stops for breath, exhausted. He hears footsteps, panting-- the dogs! They're very close! He staggers off again.
CUT TO:
EXT: STREET. NIGHT
Running madly, the dogs catch up with the man. Just as they are about to attack, something invisible happens. One dog drops on the spot as if shot, wile the other rears backward, screaming as if in great pain, turns around and runs away.
CUT TO:
EXT: OUTSIDE. NIGHT
Man comes to a building with a large clock on its side. He enters. A moment later, his two PURSUERS appear. Dangerous looking guys. Both of them have guns. They enter the building after him.
CUT TO:
INT: CLOCK TOWER. NIGHT
At the top of the stairs camera watches while MAN climbs spiral staircase towards us. At the top, he sees there is nowhere to go. The bad guys are close behind. Desperate, he spies a small door and opens it. It leads out to the clock face. He starts to climb out.
CUT TO:
EXT: CLOCK TOWER. NIGHT
Grabbing hold of the clock's hands (a la Harold Lloyd), Man swings out on it. The clock hand clicks down a notch. Pursuers appear at doorway and look down at him. Pursuer One suddenly gets a very sick look on his face and falls out the window, sailing past the Man. He shifts his weight. Click hand clicks down another notch. Then another. It's at "6" now and he's about to lose his grip. Second Pursuer reaches for him but when he gets too close, he gets same sick look on his face and falls too.
A small door opens in the number '6' and a very feminine arm reaches out, holding a can of "TOUGH GUY" deodorant spray. A big whoosh of the spray shoots into both the man's armpits.
CUT TO:
EXT: STREET. NIGHT
Beautiful MODEL in trenchcoat stands holding a can of "TOUGH GUY" spray.
MODEL
You don't have to smell bad to be bad. Use 'Tough Guy' anti-perspirant every day. Available
at all good men's stores.
Advertisement ends with a man's fist slamming down a can of "TOUGH GUY" on a wooden table.
CUT TO:
INT: CONFERENCE/SCREENING ROOM. DAY
A Hi-Tech, expensively furnished room. Five people sitting around a conference table-- 4 men, one woman (WILLA BRANDT--30's, attractive, capable). One entire wall of the room is covered with video monitors showing the same image: the finish of the "Tough Guy" ad. Only JACK QUINN is standing, his back to the screens. He's confident as hell.
JACK
We've tested this ad everywhere. It's gotten the best audience reaction of any spot we've done in the last two months. We're sure it will move your product up from its previous eighteen percent of the market to at least twenty-one.
He begins to walk around the room, shooting energy out all over.
JACK
We've decided to sell entertainment this time and not only deodorant. People can laugh at a sensitive subject and not just feel ashamed.
What's important-- He's interrupted by KARGL sitting at the table.
KARGL
What's important, Mr. Quinn, is that this had do better than the others your agency has made for us. As we all know, they were singularly unsuccessful.
JACK
(shooting right back, self-assured)
That's why the head of our agency asked me to take over your account, Mr. Kargl.
Jack looks at his watch and starts to gather his papers.
JACK
I'm sorry, but I must go to another meeting. If you have any questions or things you would like to add, please tell my associate, Ms. Brandt. Excuse me.
Jack looks at WILLA and goes TO the door. When he's gone there's a pause, then KARGL to WILLA
KARGL
He's awfully sure of himself.
WILLA
(diplomatic, but no less firmly)
He's the best in the business. He has a right to be sure of himself.
CUT TO:
INT: HALLWAY
Jack walks fast down hallway of ad agency. It's a big bustling place. He greets people along the way, stopped now and then by secretaries to sign papers or take messages. None of IT slows him as he moves to another conference room. Almost at the door, he is grabbed by MEWSHAW
MEWSHAW
Jack! Come here. You gotta look at this.
Jack tries to pull away
JACK
Mewshaw, I gotta meeting right now. Lemme go!
MEWSHAW
But Jack, this is about your next meeting and your
future client!
Mewshaw pulls him to a nearby desk where a number of people are watching a portable TV.
CUT TO:
INT: NEWSROOM
NEWSCASTER in full swing.
NEWSCASTER
The overthrow of the previous government in
Saru by the forces of General Menelik Cthulu has alarmed Mideast experts and is the main topic of conversation in the hastily arranged meeting in Abu Dhabi today.The colorful Cthulu, notorious for his eccentric proclamations and behavior, has not mellowed since taking over power in this small, oil rich country.
CUT TO:
INT: TV STUDIO
CTHULU
(about sixty, white hair, a rough peasant's face and
magnetic, fiery eyes) stares directly into the camera.
CTHULU
(in good, heavily accented English)
I am no terrorist, I am a truth seeker. Perhaps that is what makes so many people uncomfortable.
Why weren't we invited to this meeting of Mideastern leaders? If they want to discuss the situation in Saru, shouldn't they invite the people who run the country? The only thing the People's Republic wants from the rest of the world is peace and the respect--
CONROY
(o.s.)
Turn that damned thing off! Are you nuts? They're in the next room!
CUT TO:
INT: AGENCY, HALLWAY
Three people jump to turn off the set when CONROY, Jack's boss, comes up behind them and roars. Jack stays where he is and turns to face him, unafraid.
CONROY
Jack, why the hell aren't you in the meeting? These people are punctual.
JACK
Did you hear the news? You want to take these Saru wackos on as clients? Who do we represent next, The Flat Earth Society?
Willa comes up to Jack
CONROY
Willa, don't let him talk like this in that meeting! I swear to God, Jack, if you mess up, I'll kick your ass. I don't care how good you are. This could be our biggest account.
The three walk to the conference room.
JACK
But still no one knows what they want?
Conroy shakes head no.
JACK
Can I ask?
CONROY
Nope. You have the meeting and then the two of you go to lunch with them this afternoon. Sooner or later they've got to tell you something
Conroy straightens Jack's tie and pats his shoulder.
CONROY
This could give us all villas on the Cote D'Azur, Jack. Please do it right. Willa, you watch him.
Conroy leaves, J&W watch him.
JACK
How come he's always telling you to watch me?
WILLA
Because he knows without me, you wouldn't be the best.
JACK
That's true. So, are we ready for the terrorists?
Pretends embarrassment, covers mouth with hand.
JACK
OOPS, did I say that? I meant tourists! Tourists!
WILLA (pushing towards the door)
Come on, Mr. Subtle.
CUT TO
INT: CONFERENCE ROOM
Small, luxurious room. Obviously for special clients. Sitting facing the door are DJEBELI, SADR, EL-ROUBY. All middle-aged, well-dressed, bearded. They rise when Jack and Willa enter. Everyone shakes hands, sits. A silence falls that becomes painful. The Saruvians wait passively. They are the 'hunters' here, J&W the prey.
JACK
Gentlemen, we're very flattered your government is considering our agency for your project. But you really must give us some idea of what you'd like us to do for Saru.
Willa shoots him a look-- he's not supposed to ask this question.
Several long beats while the men look at each other.
DJEBELI (in good, but accented English)
We are sure if we engage your company you will do a very excellent job, Mr. Quinn. We have seen much of your work. Unfortunately, we cannot discuss the job we are offering to you now, but I will go into greater detail why at lunch.
Jack frowns, taking this in. Djebeli turns to Willa and says in Arabic
DJEBELI
You are a lovely woman.
Willa smiles and answers in slow, careful Arabic
WILLA
(in slow careful Arabic)
It is kind of you to say that.
(in English)
I only studied Arabic for two years in college.
Djebeli nods-- he knows this.
DJEBELI
Are you a political man, Mr. Quinn?
JACK (carefully, doesn't know where this is going)
I believe in certain things, but none of them are
political.
EL-ROUBY
What do you think of General Cthulu?
JACK
I think what CNN wants me to think. Or NBC. I only know what they say on television. What they show is.... offbeat.
Sadr turns to the other and says something in Arabic. They smile.
EL ROUBY
Mr. Sadr says you should be a diplomat, Mr. Quinn. Your phrasing is delicate. But you will be very surprised when you meet the General. He is not the man you see on CNN. All great visionaries are considered madmen in the beginning. Sometimes an act that you do today can only be appreciated tomorrow.
El Rouby rises and the other two men with him. J&W follow.
EL ROUBY
So then, we will meet at two o'clock in Restaurant Bazz'af. I hope you will like it there. Real Saruvian cooking! Saruvians leave.
JACK
What do they eat at a Saruvian restaurant-- diplomats or camels?
CUT TO:
INT: LUCIEN'S OFFICE
LUCIEN (head of the agency), Conroy, Jack and Willa sit in the boss's beautiful office. Lucien looks Ivy League but speaks with an English accent.
CONROY
How did they know you spoke Arabic, Willa?
Willa shrugs.
LUCIEN
They've obviously done their homework. They seem to know everything there is to know about the agency.
JACK
Hugh, don't misunderstand me: I have no qualms about working for Saru. You pay us very well to lie for a living. But if we do take their account, no matter what it is they want, won't it make us look very bad to our other clients when the word gets out? Won't we lose business? The world thinks this guy is really Loony Tunes!
LUCIEN
Possibly, but the amount of money that has been discussed is enormous. Plus let's face it, most of our clients aren't interested in moral issues, good and evil, all the gray stuff. They care about what sells.
JACK
I wonder what Cthulu want us to do-- advertise new ways of blowing up airports, or converting the infidels?
CUT TO:
EXT: RESTAURANT BAZZ'AF. DAY
A truck pulls up in front of the restaurant. Two MEN get out and go round the back. Opening the doors, they bring out live, large, very peculiar looking animals. They lead them around to the rear entrance of the restaurant. Lots of noise and scuffling-- like the circus just came to town.
Jack and Willa come walking down the street. Reaching the restaurant, they see this strange parade and stop to watch. The front of the place is decorated to look like a Bedouin tent in the Arabian desert.
WILLA
(uneasily)
Oh Jack, do we really have to eat here?
Jack nods and gestures for her to go in.
WILLA
But I don't like Saruvian food. I hear a great delicacy there is sheep's eyeballs.
JACK
This is their hangout in New York. They're about to offer us the biggest account ever. So we eat every sheep eyeball and camel tongue they put on our plate. That's Lucien's order.
WILLA
(gesturing towards animal parade)
But what if that's our lunch?
He shrugs.
JACK
Then it will be a lonnng afternoon.
He looks at her and makes a roar or a growl or some other animal noise, then licks his lips exaggeratedly.
JACK
Delicious!
CUT TO:
INT: RESTAURANT BAZZ'AF
The interior is garish and the worst kind of bad kitsch, Arabic taste. Too many colors, carpets, hookahs... everything. Most customers are Arabic. J&W enter and are led to a V.I.P. table where the diplomats from Saru are sitting. J&W must stop to allow a frightening-looking dish to pass on its way to another table. They gape at it, smoking and fierce looking. This is a motif throughout the scene: every time another dish passes, it is worse looking and more frightening than the last. Not until the end is their meal brought, so the audience is set up to expect the absolute worst.
WILLA
(under her breath to Jack)
Don't say a word, Jack. Don't you say anything. I know I'm going to be sick. So, Mr. Djebeli, what a lovely restaurant!
DJEBELI
It is so good of you to come. Soon you will be in the real Bazz'af, but for today this must suffice. Come, sit down.
Waiting to be seated, Jack leans over to Willa and asks quietly
JACK
Buzz Off is the capitol of Saru, right?
Willa's face tightens. She whispers harshly
WILLA
Bazz'af! Say it right!
Jack smiles like a bad boy. At the table, the others rise and everyone shakes hands. Another ugly dish goes by. Jack gawks.
JACK
Mr. El Rouby, what is that?
El Rouby looks at the passing tray.
EL ROUBY
(pedantically)
This is pronounced 'Scall-hee-ya." A delicacy from the north of Saru. A exceptional recipe of chocolate, poisonous fish, and unripe avocados. It is very delicious. Come and sit, Mr. Quinn.
Sitting next to Willa, Sadr says something to her in Arabic. She answers slowly but clearly in the language. It's obvious the men are very pleased by this.
SADR
It is wonderful you know something of our language, Ms. Brandt. It is a great compliment to us.
WILLA
I wish I had been a better language student. It takes me so long to understand things but once I learn them, they stay.
EL ROUBY
Perhaps it will be easier for you when you speak the language in Saru.
JACK
(impatient)
Can we talk about that a little? It really would help a great deal if we knew what this was all about.
DJEBELI
Recently it was decided by General Cthulu and his staff that we would give your firm the opportunity to handle the largest account our government has offered in the West.
WILLA
And we're very grateful, please know that. But could you be a little more specific?
SADR
It is something very large and...political.
WILLA
And?
SADR
(amused)
And... some things must remain secret for the time being.
JACK
(looking at him suspiciously)
I thought the big secret was you were going to offer us your tourism account.
DJEBELI
(amused, waves his hand dismissively)
What we are offering far exceeds that possibility, Mr. Quinn. Tourism is not one of our primary concerns.
They pause while another indescribable platter of food sweeps by.
WILLA
(horrified)
What is that?
EL ROUBY
'Kal-sh' a-yeesh' which means 'The Arm Turns Left.' This is not so good. Undistinguished.
SADR
(surprised)
What do you mean? Kal-sh' a-yeesh is delicious!
EL ROUBY
A minor dish.
They glare at each other.
JACK
Mr. Djebeli, I've never done a political campaign.
DJEBELI
It is not political in the way you might assume. Unlike your United States, we do not have elections in Saru. Perhaps one day when things are more settled, but not now. What we want you to do for us is different, Mr. Quinn. General Cthulu wants to tell you personally about it in Saru. It is a great honor, of course. The general is a busy man.
JACK
We have to go down there just to hear what the
deal is?
DJEBELI
(adamant)
That is one of the conditions, yes.
WILLA
What are the other conditions?
The three men look at each other.
EL ROUBY Only one: You must go to Saru next week.
Jack and Willa look at each other.
JACK
Next week? What's the hurry?
SADR
You'll learn when you get there.
JACK
Excuse my crassness, gentlemen, but how much are we talking about here? It has to be considered for us just to drop everything and go. We do have a bunch of other accounts we're working on.
DJEBELI
We have already discussed that with Mr. Lucien. Ours will be a multi-million dollar account. But much as I would like to, we are under strict instructions from General Cthulu not to give you any details until he can tell you personally.
WILLA
This whole thing is very irregular. How long would we be there?
EL ROUBY
It is not necessary for you to go, Mrs. Grove. Only
Mr. Quinn.
Willa is very hurt by the rejection and it shows. Jack sits back in his chair and shakes his head.
JACK
(very firmly)
No deal. I don't go unless she goes.
WILLA
(appeasing)
Jack--
JACK
I don't go unless you go. Period. End of discussion.
He starts to get up and the three men stand too.
DJEBELI
We did not mean to offend--
EL ROUBY
I only meant--
SADR
Of course Ms. Grove would be most welcome--
Jack looks at them a long moment, then slowly sits again.
JACK
How long would we be there?
DJEBELI
No more than a week. We would fly you down in the General's private plane, you would meet with him, then return.
JACK
That sounds like a couple of days. Why do we need a week?
EL ROUBY
There are certain things and places you must see as well which are necessary to understanding the project.
Another tray of food passes and they all watch it go by. Uh oh!
WILLA
Does it have anything to do with the image of Saru? There's an awful lot of negative publicity about your country these days.
The three Saruvians exchange glances, as if trying to decide what to say.
DJEBELI
I think my colleagues would not mind my saying that what General Cthulu has in mind could bring lasting peace to the world, and that is in no way an exaggeration. We would ask only that you participate in the endeavor.
JACK
(disbelief)
World peace? Saru?
DJEBELI
(unfazed)
Absolutely.
JACK
What if it's something I can't handle? I'm good at pushing soap and deodorant, but world peace is a tough sell to most people.
SADR
We know you can, Mr. Quinn. That's why we contacted your firm. We have spent a great deal of time reviewing your work. General Cthulu too. He made the final choice.
JACK
(surprised)
General Cthulu chose me?
Looks at Willa and raises his eyebrows.
WILLA
(firmly)
We'll come.
Glances at Jack.
Okay?
Looking carefully at her, Jack nods.
JACK
Sure. You're the boss.
EL ROUBY
Excellent!
Everyone smiles, pleased with the decision. Suddenly Sadr claps his hands in glee on seeing something coming towards them. Everyone looks up. Saruvians react with delight. Not so J&W: their mouths drop open in utter horror.
SADR
Finally, our lunch! And just in time to celebrate!
Camera closes in on J&W's stunned faces. Never show the food-- only their eyes widening as they see what they're to eat.
CUT TO:
EXT: HOTEL. DAY
Jack & Willa walking down street after lunch. Jack stops in front of hotel and looks at it appraisingly.
JACK
I think after that lunch we deserve to take the afternoon off. What do you say?
WILLA
I'd say yes, pal, but rooms in there start at five hundred a night. Why don't we just go home and buy an expensive bottle of champagne instead?
Jack takes her hand.
JACK
We'll rent a room and buy the champagne. Don't be practical all the time. It'll give you wrinkles.
They start towards the hotel.
WILLA
You know what's nice? After all the years with you, I still feel naughty doing this. What would my mother say?
JACK
She'd say don't go with the boy. You'll end up in Saru!
WILLA
Thank you again for saying yes to this trip. I know I put you on the spot back there.
JACK
I'd've said yes too. The whole deal sounds too intriguing-- money, travel, world peace? How do you think Cthulu's going to do it? Give it away free gasoline?
WILLA
(laughs, hugs him)
Sometimes I love you a lot.
They continue towards the hotel. Willa looks at him proudly. Stopping them for a moment, she pulls him over for a big kiss on the cheek.
JACK
(joking)
Which means you usually love me a little?
WILLA
(playing along)
Usually.
Enter hotel.
CUT TO:
INT; ROYAL HALL, STOCKHOLM
Film clip of distinguished looking MAN (Andrew Lumsden) receiving
Nobel Prize.
NEWSCASTER (o.s.)
It was revealed today that Nobel Prize winning Biophysiologist Andrew Lumsden is missing. He was last seen ten days ago in his laboratory at the Monell Chemical Senses Center near Philadelphia. Lumsden's family has received no ransom demand, but police are not ruling out the possibility of kidnapping. In recent years, Lumsden has been involved in a number of extremely sensitive government projects. It is rumored that at least some of them had to do with chemical warfare.
CUT TO:
EXT: LECTURE HALL. DAY
GENERAL CTHULU angrily giving a speech in front of hundreds of
adoring supporters. A newscaster's voice-over saysNT
NEWSCASTER
(o.s.)
The newest development in the disappearance of Dr. Andrew Lumsden is the unconfirmed report that he was abducted by supporters of General Menelik Cthulu. This photograph of Lumsden was purportedly taken in the capitol city, Bazz'af two days ago, although government sources there firmly reject that the missing scientist is in their country.
Lumsden photo flashed:he's flanked on either side by Arabic men. His nose is enormously, impossibly long.
JACK
(o.s.)
Uh oh--
STEWARDESS
(o.s.)
Mr. Quinn? Ms. Brandt?
CUT TO:
INT: VIENNA AIRPORT. DAY
Arabic STEWARDESS looks straight at us, as if we were Jack and Willa.
JACK
(o.s.)
Yes, are you the representative from Saru?
STEWARDESS
Yes, hello. I'm afraid we'll have to hurry. The pilot would like to take off as soon as possible.
She turns away. J&W rise from their seats, backs to us. We see they have been in airport chairs with TV's attached, watching CNN.
JACK
Just our luck, eh? We sit there half an hour waiting for the good stuff to come on. Then she has to arrive. Did you see the size of that guy's nose? He looked like Cyrano de Bergerac! Why would they want a guy like him in Saru?
WILLA
Sssh! She'll hear.
JACK
I don't care. We're about to go there anyway.
They're following the stewardess.
WILLA
Maybe it wasn't him. Maybe it's just a guy from Saru and big noses are a genetic trait there.
JACK
That wasn't a nose, honey. It was a number 2 pencil.
STEWARDESS
(over her shoulder)
Did you have any trouble getting here?
WILLA
No. It was a nice trip.
STEWARDESS
(haughty)
Unfortunately, this new sanction the British government has imposed on Saru, forbidding our planes from landing there, has made things very difficult for us. We're sorry you had to stop in Vienna.
WILLA
(fires right back)
Have you considered that sanction has to do with how your government has been behaving?
Stewardess is shocked by this. Jack's amused-- he knows Willa. They continue walking, stewardess sneaking peeks at them. STEWARDESS 2 is waiting at a gate. She picks up a walkie talkie and speaks in Arabic. J&W walk to window and stare out onto tarmac. Outside a large passenger jet painted with "Saru Airlines," sporting a logo on the tail of an eagle holding a shovel in one foot, a rifle in the other. Plane is surrounded on all sides by police cars and policemen.
STEWARDESS 2
Shall we board?
JACK
It looks like an armed camp out there! Is it always like that when you fly to Vienna?
STEWARDESS 2
It is like that when Saru Airlines flies most places, Mr. Quinn. It is a dangerous world.
She looks arrogantly at Willa who snorts and brushes by her toward the gate.
CUT TO:
EXT: TARMAC. DAY
A windy day. Storm clouds add to the dramatic effect. Willa goes first. Jack hurries to catch up with her.
JACK
Are you okay?
WILLA
Sure. It's just that that idiot reminded me we're working for Cthulu and some of the things he's done in the last few years. "It's a dangerous world we're in living in." Ha! Do you believe she said that? It's dangerous because of men like her leader! Have you read about Cthulu? I don't mean just the TV stuff. I read a biography and was stunned.
JACK
Well don't put your conscience in turbo boost over this right now, okay? All we're doing is going down to hear what he has to say: We're not working for Amnesty International.
She nods and strides faster. He touches her arm.
JACK
Okay?
WILLA
(upset)
Yes Jack, I heard you the first time.
She pushes on, leaving him behind. She goes up stairs to plane. He follows. The stewardesses see this exchange and smile at each other.
CUT TO:
INT: PLANE. DAY.
J&W are the only passengers on the giant plane.
CAPTAIN
(o.s.)
Below us now is the Nile River and in a slight half hour, we will be making our approach to Bazz'af.
They listen to the announcement and look out the window together.
Jack has a laptop open in front of him, Willa a pile of notes.
JACK
What's a slight half hour?
Willa reaches over and touches his hand.
WILLA
I'm sorry about before.
Halfway down the aisle, the two stewardesses are having a real argument. Suddenly one spits out a fast and bitter sentence. Instantly her nose beings to grow and grow, a la Pinocchio. It happens quickly. When the other stewardess sees it, she gives a terrified look at J&W and pushes her colleague into the kitchen, out of their line of sight.
WILLA
(o.s.)
Jesus, did you see that?
JACK
(o.s.)
Yes. No. I don't know what I saw.
WILLA
I do. That woman's nose just grew.
JACK
(uncertain)
Well, that's what I thought I saw. Maybe it's
just the fumes from lunch.
Stewardess with normal nose reappears from galley, smiling falsely, pushing her hair back. The scene fades with her walking towards us.
CUT TO:
EXT; SARU AIRPORT. DAY
A plane taxis across desert landscape. Close-up of familiar eagle/shovel/rifle logo on tail. Plane approaches terminal where a large group of soldiers are standing at parade rest. A VIP welcome for Jack and Willa.
Plane stops near building. As rolling staircase is brought up, 3 MILITARY MEN in full uniform emerge from the crowd and approach. Door opens. J&W appear, start down stairs. Bad Army band tries to play American national anthem.
Camera begins to pull back as greetings take place. Pull back more and more-- into the hills behind the airport, as if looking through a zoom lens. Band music becomes fainter. We begin to hear the click-snap-click of metallic parts being snapped together. Louder and louder.
CUT TO:
EXT: FIELD. DAY
Close-up of hands assembling a very Hi-Tech surface-to-air rocket launcher or bazooka. MAN in Bedouin clothes loads weapon, sights carefully and fires at people on airfield.
CUT TO:
EXT: AIRPORT. DAY
Jack smiles while shaking hands with Saru official. We hear a loud BOOM. Jack looks over the official's shoulder and his expression blanks.
JACK
Get down!
He jumps on Willa, slamming her to the ground. The missile flies well over them. It hits far down landing field but explodes loud enough to send people running. Panic everywhere. J&W are grabbed and hurried to a waiting limo. It screeches away as panic continues.
CUT TO:
INT: CAR. DAY
Inside car with J&W is DJEBELI. This time he's dressed in military uniform and has an air of distance and formality.
JACK
What the fuck was that? Are you okay, honey?
Turns to Willa, sitting hunched in a corner with her hands pressed to her forehead. She nods but won't speak.
JACK
(angry)
What's going on, Djebeli?
DJEBELI
I'm sorry, Mr. Quinn. We took every precaution to prevent this from happening. But we have many enemies. It's what we told you in New York- General Cthulu has found a way to save the world. But there are people who do not want the world saved. We are going now to the General's camp so he can tell you himself.
The three are silent as the car speeds on.
WILLA
(erupting)
Why didn't you warn us of this in New York? You
had no right to endanger us! This is your country, Mr. Djebeli, not ours. It's only a job for us. We didn't agree to risk our lives.
DJEBELI
(angry)
This doesn't concern one country or a job! The world is at stake! The future of Mankind! We have been at war forever. My son died fighting to recapture our country from Cthulu's brother. My son, Ms. Brandt. I do not want any more of my family to die. I do not want you to die. Or Anyone else. General Cthulu can stop it all. He is willing to save the world for nothing. He gains nothing from it.
During the monologue, Jack looks out the window, seemingly indifferent. Now he turns.
JACK
Your leader doesn't have the reputation of being a
peacemaker.
DJEBELI
(nodding)
General Cthulu has the reputation of being a lunatic who would do anything to achieve what he believes. We are not naive to the world's opinion. That is not the point. None of that has anything to do with this.
WILLA
(exasperated)
What is this? Please tell us! We were almost killed back there! We came to Saru. We've done what you asked so tell us something.
DJEBELI
(carefully, then warming to it)
You are about to hear everything from the General himself. But I will say this: The quality that distinguishes man from every other creature is his ability to communicate. No other animal does it with such sophistication.
JACK
So what? No other animal destroys themselves so well either!
DJEBELI
Exactly! And how does he destroy himself? For the same reason-- communication. But false communication. Lies. What other animal lies? Dogs? Lions? No. All of our wars are started with lies. All hatred is born in lies.
Window separating them from CHAUFFEUR slides down. Driver says something in Arabic to Djebeli who turns in his seat and looks around, getting his bearings.
DJEBELI
We are almost there.
JACK
(puzzled)
Almost where? This is the middle of the desert!
DJEBELI
The General's campsite. It is safer for him to live outside the city. He moves his headquarters all the time.
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT. DAY
Limousine slows, then pulls off main highway onto unpaved road running into the desert as far as the eye can see. The car flies down it in giant swirls of dust.
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT. DAY
Limo passes shepherd standing alone by the side of the road. He watches expressionless as car drives by.
CUT TO:
INT: CAR. DAY
Looking out window, Willa sees large caravan of camels crossing the desert in the middle distance. All very beautiful and stark. She turns to Jack, gesturing for him to look. Djebeli watches them as they crane to look out the window at the spectacle.
CUT TO:
INT: SENTRY BOX. DAY
Seen through a peephole, the car comes fast towards us. There is no sound other than the hush of tires getting closer. Then in Arabic (with subtitles)
SOLDIER 1
(o.s.)
That's them. Get ready.
SOLDIER 2
(o.s.)
Is my nose all right?
SOLDIER 1
Yes, it's back to normal. Here they come.
CUT TO:
EXT: SENTRY POST. DAY
Limo drives up to sentry post. Two soldiers, armed and ready, approach. They raise their arms to stop it. Everyone is forced out, Jack & Willa carefully searched. Djebeli stands alongside, not interfering. They are given the okay and get back in the car. Drive through the gates of a compound that resembles a series of World War 2 bomb bunkers. The contrast between the compound and the empty desert is dramatic. As they drive, the following conversation goes on.
JACK
(o.s.)
It reminds me of Quantico.
DJEBELI
(o.s.)
Quantico? What is that?
JACK
(o.s.)
It's where I did my training as a Marine. Does General Cthulu really live here?
DJEBELI
(o.s.)
Sometimes. He must move his headquarters often.
JACK
(o.s.)
Because of the opposition? Like what happened
today?
DJEBELI
(o.s.)
In part. Aha! There is the General!
Limo drives towards one of the bunkers as CTHULU emerges. He is dressed in very plain (non-military) clothes. Smiling, he waves. From this first impression, he's not as fierce looking as Ayatollah Khomeini, but he ain't Santa Claus either.
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT. TWILIGHT
Out in the middle of the desert, Jack, Willa, and Cthulu sit on pillows near a bunch of black Bedouin tents. It appears no one else is around, but when camera pulls back, we see many guards at a discreet distance. Cthulu hands Jack tea from a small gas stove set up in front of them.
CTHULU
There is a proverb--'God provides the food, men provide the cooks.' What the world thinks of me and how I have cooked for my people is not important. The People's Republic of Saru is stronger and healthier than it has been in years. We have enemies and we have problems, but they will be handled. Is there anything else you would like to ask me? Please do. I want to be honest with you.
WILLA
Is it true you studied medicine in Poland?
CTHULU
(smiling)
You have done your homework, Ms. Brandt. Yes, I studied in Breslau which is famous for its medical school. I was particularly interested in the work of Rudolf Virchow. Do you know him?
Both shake their heads no.
CTHULU
He was a professor of pathology at the University of Berlin in the middle of the nineteenth century. Did pioneering research in such things as embolism, thrombosis and leukemia. He even invented the words to describe them! A remarkable man!
Stops himself and smiles.
CTHULU
(charming)
Don't get me started talking about my hobbies! I can become very boring very quickly. I am very interested in medicine, and always have been. When I was young I wanted to be a doctor, but then time and history intervened. I have had a strange life, but an interesting one. Luckily what we are planning to do now is not so far removed from the field of medicine.
JACK
Why did you choose us for this project?
CTHULU
Because you are not only very talented, but your work shows an impressive balance of cynicism and naiveté. A fool can easily drop a rock into a well, but a hundred scholars may not be able to raise it out again.
WILLA
What do you mean?
CTHULU
(laughing)
Mr. Quinn is successful at selling things because
part of his heart is foolish. That is a compliment. I have looked at so many of his advertisements. In one respect, they are the work of a very smart man. But more importantly, it is also the work of a fool and that is what interests me the most. There must be a naiveté to do what I have in mind. A cynic only sees the dark side and that is only half
the story.
JACK
(antsy)
Would you please tell us what you want us to do? Cthulu stands up and walks a few steps, his back to them.
CTHULU
There is no place like the desert for quiet. One night I was sitting out here alone, watching the sky. It was full of shooting stars. Like the heavens were at war! Then something happened.
Waving his hand in an arc to take in the sky, he turns abruptly to face J&W. His face is full of wonder.
CTHULU
God gave me a vision! Immoral, stupid, unimportant me! I saw a child across the sky! And do you know who that child was?
FADE OUTNT
EXT: DESERT SKY. NIGHT
FADE IN on Cthulu's face, same wild expression, very brightly illuminated. Where is this strong light coming from? Camera moves around to show what he is looking at. Across the entire sky in front of him is the Disney(?) cartoon character of Pinocchio.
PINOCCHIO
(high cartoon voice)
Cthulu, it is time for you to act. You must help save the world!
Stay on Pinocchio the whole scene. He looks at us as if we were Cthulu.
CTHULU
(o.s.)
Is it...is it you?
Pinocchio makes a disgusted face.
PINOCCHIO
Of course it is! I have come to tell you your mission. I will make it easy for you. I will instruct you.
CTHULU
(o.s.)
But...why me?
PINOCCHIO
Because you are a fool and we have tried everything else. A fool can easily drop a rock into a well, but a hundred scholars may not be able to raise it up again.
CTHULU
(o.s.)
What would you like me to do?
PINOCCHIO
Make mankind honest again.
CTHULU
(o.s.)
But is that possible?
PINOCCHIO
(annoyed)
Relax! I said I would help. Now, you know the cactus called Moon's Eye? All right. Find a full Moon's Eye cactus. Then some other things. Maybe you'd better get paper and make a list.
Pinocchio starts to walk around the heavens whistling, as if waiting for Cthulu to return.
PINOCCHIO
Okay, are you ready? Then write this down. One moon's eye cactus, a liter of sand, a liter of olive oil...
FADE on him as he continues listing ingredients.
FADE OUT
EXT: DESERT. EVENING
J&W's faces as they listen to Cthulu talk. Incredulous, though they try to hide it. They know he's nuts but know they have to be diplomatic.
JACK
(under his breath to Willa)
And then Gepetto told me how to make Love Potion Number Nine.
WILLA
(suppressing a smile)
And it was really...Pinocchio?
CTHULU
Across the entire sky.
JACK
What was it you mixed in with the Moon's Eye?
CTHULU
(instantly sensing Jack's disbelief)
Something that will change the world, Mr. Quinn. Would you like a demonstration?
They nod.
CTHULU
Fine. We will start with you, Mr. Quinn, because I can see you are a skeptic.
Jack starts to protest but Cthulu waves him off.
CTHULU
Tell me, in all honesty, what you think of what I have been saying.
Jack puts on his best professional face.
JACK
I think it's amazing if you do what you say you
can.
The moment the words are out of his mouth, Jack's nose begins to grow, a la Pinocchio. So long that it's soon the length of a banana rising from the center of his face. Willa sees it and screams. Cthulu doesn't move from his seat, but gives a satisfied smile. At a certain point, Jack's nose stops growing but he's totally freaked out.
JACK
(horrified)
What is this? What have you done?
CTHULU
(calm)
Now tell the truth.
JACK
(nuts)
What? What truth? What did you do?
CTHULU
(thundering)
Tell the truth! Say what you really think of my
vision!
JACK
I think you're fucking nuts! What did you do to my
nose?
At once his nose shrinks, or rather deflates like a long balloon. In seconds it is back to normal. Cthulu nods, he knows how this works. Stunned, Jack watches the nose go down. Willa stands by, hand to her mouth in horror and fascination.
CTHULU
Now you are blessed.
WILLA
(scared)
What did you do to him? What is it?
CTHULU
What do you think of me, Ms. Brandt?
About to blurt something, Willa catches herself at the last moment.
WILLA
I think you're frightening.
CTHULU
(nodding)
I'm sure. But for the moment, tell me I'm wonderful.
WILLA
Why?
CTHULU
Because I want to show you something.
WILLA
(hesitant)
I think you're wonderful.
Immediately her nose grows like Jack's. She shrieks.
WILLA
(howling)
MONSTER!
Her nose doesn't grow as large because less time passes between her lie and the truth. Moments pass as the couple digest what has happened to them.
CTHULU
A man has two choices-- to lie or tell the truth. Because we're all lazy, we choose the easier way: We lie. Now that is finished. The world will not lie anymore.
Reaching into his pocket, he takes out a small bottle of liquid. Holds it out for them to see.
CTHULU
Here is my message. My vision. It will save us all from destroying ourselves. The smallest drop in a man's drink prevents him from lying for the rest of his life. Because then it immediately grows. Until he tells the truth again. There is no antidote.
He has no control once it is in his body. I put it in your tea, so you are both blessed now.
Finish on the J&W's horrified faces.
CUT TO:
EXT: CAMEL MARKET. DAY
Two MEN talking in the Saru camel market. The animal they are discussing stands in the background. They speak in Arabic which is translated via subtitles. While he speaks, the owner drinks from a bottle of Coca-Cola.
OWNER
It is a good animal.
BUYER
It is a good animal, but you are asking too much for it.
The buyer's nose immediately begins to grow. As soon as he realizes this, he reaches into his robe and pulls out his wallet.
BUYER
(distraught)
All right, all right, I'll pay!
Owner takes another drink of Coke and waits while the other counts out the money.
CUT TO:
INT: BEDROOM. NIGHT
The scene is done in Arabic (with subtitles) in complete dark.
MAN
I'm going to ask you only once: Did you sleep with him?
WOMAN
(indignant)
With Kambiz? Are you insane? Why are you so jealous?
Long pause.
MAN
I'm still waiting for your answer.
WOMAN
No. I didn't sleep with him!
Sounds of rustling, bedclothes being pushed aside.
WOMAN
(scared)
What are you doing?
MAN
Turning on the light. I want to see your face.
WOMAN
(shouting)
No, don't! Don't!
Light comes on-- WOMAN lying in bed with HUSBAND. She has the nose. Husband sees it and starts slapping her around while she screams.
CUT TO:
EXT: ARABIC CEMETERY. DAY
Large group of mourners gathered for a funeral. Their expressions run the gamut from grief to indifference. An impressive looking CLERIC stands in front of them and begins the eulogy.
CLERIC
It is with the saddest of hearts that we gather today to say a final good-bye to our friend and brother, Hassan. He was a man of the most impeccable character. A loving father, honorable in business...
As he drones on, camera moves to show mourner's faces. Reaching one BOY, it stops. His face lights up and keeps growing more and more delighted. This is gradually mirrored by others around him. Soon everyone is grinning or beginning to laugh. Camera moves back to CLERIC whose nose is growing as he talks on.
CUT TO:
EXT. STREET. DAY
The same scene J&W saw on CNN when they were watching TV in the Vienna airport: Professor Andrew Lumsden with a huge nose being accompanied somewhere by two Arab men.
NEWSCASTER
One of the men being questioned by the FBI about the Lumsden kidnapping is Mahmoud Tahboub, a long time resident of Saru and a close associate of General Cthulu--
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT. NIGHT
Cthulu's face. Blissful.
CTHULU
You see, it's so very simple. Just a matter of chemistry.
JACK
(angry)
Why are you doing it?
CTHULU
(reciting)
"It's the end of the century; almost everyone dreams of money or revenge." That is by one of your American poets. But he is right. Mankind is destroying everything because of his selfishness and dishonesty. I want to save the world, Mr. Quinn. In six weeks time, there will be a meeting of the United Nations in Vienna. It will be attended by all the leaders of the G7 nations and Russia as a show of solidarity for world peace. At that meeting, each of these leaders will be given some of our compound. It has already been arranged. But that will not be enough. We need to show
them a film that demonstrates the importance of our... message and the effect it will have on the way mankind lives in the Twenty First Century. That will be your job-- to create a short film to show the world how things will be different once everyone has been given it.
WILLA
Everyone? You're going to force people to take
it? You have no right!
CTHULU
That sounds very American. But this is not democracy, it is survival. Someone must insure we will still be here tomorrow. I am willing to take that responsibility. There is no way to stop mankind from killing. But so much death is due to lies. We can stop that.
WILLA
You're going to force every person on earth take your medicine?
CTHULU
That is correct.
WILLA
How?
CTHULU
It is not as difficult as you would think. We will of course start with the Western countries because they are the most powerful and the greatest liars.
WILLA
(distraught)
But--
JACK
What kind of film do you want us to make?
CTHULU
What you do best-- an advertisement. A convincing film about our Miracle. And for that we will pay you five million dollars.
WILLA
What if we refuse to do it?
CTHULU
Then we will keep you here as our guests until the meeting in Vienna is over. After that, you may go home.
JACK
We're prisoners?
CTHULU
You are my guests.
JACK
(aggressive)
I don't want to be your guest.
WILLA
We have other commitments in New York, General. We can't just walk away from them for six weeks because of one job.
CTHULU
I understand that. But you must realize we cannot let you return until after the Vienna meeting. It would endanger our plan, now that you know about it.
JACK
What if we promise not to talk?
CTHULU
That is not enough. Besides, even if you did, who would believe you? Who would believe a man whose nose grows like Pinocchio? It's in your best interest to stay here now, if only to accustom yourselves to what has happened. Believe me, it takes time to realize that for the rest of your life, you must tell the truth.
WILLA
Have you taken it, General?
CTHULU
I will when the time is right. Until then certain lies will be necessary.
WILLA
(cynical)
That sounds very convenient.
CTHULU
(hard as nails)
I am not interested in your opinion, Ms. Brandt. The only reason you are here is because Mr. Quinn would not have come otherwise. He thinks you are necessary. I do not.
A couple of beats while the ominousness of this sinks in.
JACK
(exploding)
People don't always want the truth. Sometimes
it's destructive and evil. A dying patient asks the
doctor Do I have a chance? No, you'll be dead in six months. Sometimes lies give us hope. Remember that word? Remember what it can do for us? What happens to hope in your new truthful world, General? When everyone is as honest as Abe Lincoln, but the truth doesn't set us free? You're ugly. Or you're stupid. Or I don't love you and never have. But I have to tell you because I can't lie anymore and fuck you if you don't like it.
CTHULU
(a beat, then peacefully to them)
This is true, Mr. Quinn: Fuck you if you don't like it.
CUT TO:
INT: HOTEL LOBBY. DAY
Jack comes storming out of the hotel office, followed by MAN (chaperone) in uniform. Jack's nose is Pinocchio size. Willa is waiting for him at the desk. Man veers off in the other direction.
WILLA
What did they say?
JACK
Did you see that guy following me? He stood two feet away the whole time I was talking. What did they say? Our beloved bosses? The guys who love us with all their hearts? They said Cthulu talked to them already about our staying here till we finish the job. It's okay with them if we're gone six weeks. No problem. Don't worry about the other accounts. Cthulu's thought of everything. But wanna hear the interesting part? He's only paying the agency three million for this job, not the five he said. The extra two is for us if we do it. He came on the line right after I hung up with them and told me. Our little bonus, and he'll put it in any bank in any country we want.
WILLA
(thoughtful)
The strange thing is, what he's doing is good when you think of the big picture.
JACK
Are you crazy? Remember freedom? The world's favorite, most misused word? You be honest for twenty four hours and see how much good it does you. Or anyone else. See how many friends you have left.
WILLA
(defensive)
I was only saying--
JACK
(starting for the elevator)
I know what you were saying. But truth in the wrong hands is as dangerous as a lie in the wrong hands! Come on, let's go to the room.
CUT TO:
INT: ELEVATOR.
J&W and MAN stand silently as the elevator rises. When the car stops and door opens, the man reaches down and picks up a slip of paper.
MAN
I think you dropped this.
Offers paper to Willa
WILLA
No, I didn't--
MAN
(insistent)
Yes, I definitely think you dropped it.
Realizing it's important, she takes the paper and looks at man.
WILLA
Thank you.
Man nods, but ignores them and they get out. Doors close.
CUT TO
INT. HALL
Walking hurriedly down the hall, J&W look eagerly at each other, dying to see what's on the paper. When they reach the door to their room, Jack stops them and gestures instead toward the emergency exit a few feet away.
CUT TO
INT: STAIRWELL
Standing close together, looking at each other. Willa holds the paper.
JACK
I'm sure our room is bugged. It's better out here.
Open it.
She reads, hands it to him. He reads.
JACK
First they try to shoot us at the airport, but now they want to free us? Isn't that a little odd?
WILLA
Not really. They thought we came to work for Cthulu. Now they know we don't want to. Getting us out of the country would embarrass Cthulu, and they know we'd tell the world. It'd stop him... there are a lot of reasons.
JACK
Why can't they tell the world? What do they need us for?
WILLA
(exasperated)
I don't know, Jack. But the only thing they want us to do is be in the lobby tomorrow night at nine. I think we can do that. It's not like we've got other plans.
JACK
Christ, do you think they can get us out of here?
WILLA
I don't know. But we sure aren't going to get out by ourselves. We're watched every minute of the day. I keep expecting someone to pop out of the
toilet when I'm in there.
JACK
Well, these guys shot a bomb at us... so they must have some kind of organization to have that kind of hardware.
WILLA
I'd give so much to be home right now.
JACK
Then all we'd have to do is try to explain our noses to the gang in New York. I wonder who these guys are? The other side, I mean.
WILLA
The liars.
JACK
Huh?
WILLA
The liars. The people who don't like being told what's good for them.
JACK
(appreciative)
The liars! Yeah, that's good. The United People's Front of Liars. Let's do it, Will. Let's meet them and get the hell out of here while we still can.
CUT TO:
INT: HOTEL LOBBY
J&W sit together in a bustling hotel lobby. Many armed soldiers amongst the guests coming and going. The room is a combination elegant lobby and armed camp. J&W are trying to play it cool, but it's plain they're waiting for something to happen.
A group of Arab BUSINESSMEN come in. They're all wearing white robes and carrying briefcases. Move to the registration desk where some begin to check in, etc. The others in the group turn slowly and look over the lobby. A few beats, then they pull out automatic weapons and shoot at the soldiers. Chaos. Two of the businessmen race over to J&W and grab them. One is man from the elevator yesterday.
MAN
Come! Hurry!
The front doors burst open and government troops flood in. The "Liars" are outnumbered and quickly surrender. LEADER of troops says something in Arabic. Liars drop to the floor, hands behind their backs. Leader gestures to his soldiers. They shoot the Liars as they lay helpless. J&W stand, terrified.
Shooting done, Leader says something to a soldier who takes J&W towards the door. One of the Liars is still moving. Leader goes over and shoots him. Says something in Arabic and his soldiers laugh.
CUT TO:
EXT: BALCONY. SUNSET
Evening in Saru. We look out over the city of Bazz'af . Sounds of the Muslim call to prayer from minarets. Lights just coming on, birds flying in patterns across the orange sky... a beautiful, exotic scene.
J&W sitting on the balcony.
JACK
(angry)
At least they could give us some booze to drink. I hate orange juice!
WILLA
(quietly)
What are we going to do, Jack?
JACK
We're going to make the fucking film and get out of here, hopefully.
Stands up and pours his drink over the balcony.
JACK
You know what scares me most? That these people are sure what they're doing is right. And not just Cthulu; all of his followers too. Zealots like them die believing, they kill believing, mothers give up their sons because they believe... Look at you and me-- what do we believe? What do we know for sure? What's right? What's wrong? I don't know. We just bump along from minute to minute, hoping for the best. Not them. They know.
WILLA
Are you jealous of them?
Jack turns to her, smiling sadly.
JACK
Sure, in a way. I'd love to believe in something as wholeheartedly as they do, It must be a
wonderful feeling.
He waves towards the view, taking in everything.
JACK
Listen to that-- all those millions and millions of people praying. They truly believe God hears them. That's amazing these days, when everyone else is so cynical. That's amazing. And I'll tell you
something else, Willa: I've been thinking about Cthulu's miracle cure. You know what-- he may be right. Maybe if we're all forced to tell the truth every minute of the day it really will make things better.
WILLA
That's bullshit!
JACK
You got a better solution? No one tells the truth anymore. It gets you into trouble, it's inconvenient, it weighs too much. Don't you think things would be better his way? Tell the truth!
WILLA
(smiling angrily)
I have to tell the truth, Jack. Remember? Telling the truth should be based on choice. If we have no choice we're not human anymore. Besides, there are things that should never be said. You're right-- most of the time we say enough of the truth so you we're not lying, and less of it so that you don't go around hurting people and making trouble. Is that wrong?
JACK
But what if Hitler had been forced to tell the truth from the beginning? A lot of lives would have been saved.
WILLA
He did tell the truth; his truth! People have been telling it for a million years but that hasn't made things better. You said it yourself-- Tell all the ugly people the truth. The doomed. The losers. The has beens. The never will be's. Sometimes I can't stand the sight of you, Jack. Your selfishness and cynicism make me sick. Do you want to hear that? I don't think so. But because I love you, I keep quiet and live with it, or some of it, and try to change the rest. What good would it do if day after day I told you what I really thought of who you are?
Hurt by her honesty, he turns away. She goes over and touches his arm.
WILLA
Don't take it the wrong way. I love you. You're my best friend. I tell you more of my truth than anyone I've ever known.
Turned away, he doesn't see her nose start to grow. But she does and starts to laugh at her lie. He turns to see what's so funny, sees it, and laughs too.
CUT TO:
INT; HOTEL ROOM
J&W working on advertisement. He holds up story board and talks enthusiastically. She listens, shakes her head no. He stomps around the room, furious.
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT. DAY
Cthulu, Willa & Jack tour Bedouin tents. All we see is poverty and sadness. It's obvious Cthulu knows these people and they like him. Some children run by. We see they are chasing one boy who has a familiarly long nose. Willa nudges Jack-- he saw it too.
CUT TO:
EXT: BALCONY. DAY
J&W sitting on their balcony, looking exhausted. Jack reaches for his drink, takes a sip and makes a bitter face. He stands and dramatically pours it over the balcony. Willa gets up, looks over the rail, then back at Jack with a hand gesture that says he hit someone below.
CUT TO:
INT: BEDROOM. NIGHT
J&W rolling around, passionate. Suddenly everything stops and Jack jumps out of bed. Startled, Willa sits up. He turns on lights and rushes to the table across the room where he's been working. Sits down, bare-assed, and begins to write furiously. She falls back on the bed, frustrated, and pulls a pillow over her head.
CUT TO:
INT; BEDROOM. DAY
Jack lies across the bed, dead to the world. Willa gets up and tiredly walks towards the bathroom. She passes his work table. Seeing what's there, she stops and sits, looking closely at what he did the night before.
CUT TO:
INT: ROOM
CLOSE-UP of BOY, around eight. He's sweet looking but naughty too.
BOY
My Mom gave me money and told me to go to the store to buy bread.
Smiles, looks sheepish. Shrugs
BOY
But I bought some candy instead. When I got home, I told her I lost the money. She believed me.
Suddenly an arm appears from off camera and punches the kid full force in the face. We see everything-- punch, blood, kid flying offscreen from the force.
CUT TO:
INT: ROOM
Same BOY, now fifteen. The difference, besides age, is clear on his face: there are a number of large scars.
BOY
I had to cheat! It was either that or repeat the year! I'm not going to do that stupid class again. No way! Sure I cheated. Anyway, the teacher never saw a thing. So big deal-- it didn't hurt anyone.
Looks cautiously at screen, as if waiting for audience to challenge him. Again, the fist flies in from off camera and knocks him across the room. Brutal as hell.
CUT TO:
INT: ROOM
Same place. Boy is now MAN, middle twenties. Besides new scars, his face shows the beginning of bitterness and cynicism on a harder face. To complete the "grown up" picture, he's smoking a cigarette.
MAN
What's a lie? A lie is not telling the truth.
Thinks about it, smiles cunningly.
MAN
Sometimes. But sometimes you've got to lie or else there's trouble. Everyone knows that. You lie to save yourself, you lie to protect others--
He's into it, thinking out loud, when the fist smacks him again.
CUT TO:
INT: ROOM
Now forty-five, MAN is balding, more scarred than ever. Sitting in expensive leather chair, he's well dressed and pleased with himself.
MAN
I wouldn't call it lying. That's too strong a term. Business is competition. It's being aggressive, competitive, imaginative... Lying? I don't know.
Thinks it over, smiles to himself.
MAN
Maybe you're right. Sometimes selling a product is more important than telling the truth about it.
This time instead of being hit, the man freezes the moment he sees what's coming. Contorted, twisted, it's a different expression from the confident, relaxed face we saw a moment ago. But we know what it means.
CUT TO:
INT: ROOM
Now very old, MAN is lying in hospital bed. His face is a mix of age, scars, wrinkles, bitterness... He's looking furiously at the camera, but in there somewhere is still the face of the boy.
MAN
Why don't you leave me alone? Stop hitting me! Haven't you done enough? You got what you wanted. Look at me, there's nothing left! I have nothing left to lie about! I know I made a mess of things. But that was because you never left me alone. You never let me be! It's your fault!
Hand descends from above. Old man cringes, ready to be hit again. But hand stops and merely rests on the side of the bed. Camera moves around, shifts perspective from old man to the "Hitter." And we see that hitter is the old man himself. Same face, pajamas... Hitter looks pityingly down at himself, then slowly walks away from bedside, shakes his head in regret.
CUT TO:
INT: OFFICE
J&W, Cthulu, advisors sitting around a table. Jack is holding up storyboard cards, finishing the presentation of his "Truth Spot."
JACK
Fade out. Then General, you come on and give your spiel about what the whole thing means, how we're destroying ourselves with our lies and what you're going to do about it.
Silence. Everyone looks at Cthulu who's mulling it over.
CTHULU
It is very strong. I like parts of it, but I wonder if all people will understand it. Maybe it is too artistic and not obvious enough. It absolutely must be understood by the whole world. Mr. Quinn. There is a lot talking and not enough action. Like computer ads. Those are very good.
He stops, expecting Jack to understand what he means. His advisors smile as if what he's just said is genius.
WILLA
What do you mean, computer ads?
CTHULU
There is so much action in them. All those special effects and movement! I saw one the other day that was a beautiful mix of Roger Rabbit and Toy Story, but with beautiful women too.
JACK
(trying to salvage anything)
This is only the rough idea, General. We can work out the specifics if you like the concept.
CTHULU
The concept is good-- how we ruin ourselves by lying. This I like, but I think the whole thing should be more....zippy.
He is pleased with his word and looks at the advisors to see if they caught it. Jack and Willa look at each other.
WILLA
The child being hit is very strong stuff. It'll stay in people's minds, but I don't know if it's too much. It may be too aggressive. It may turn people off.
Cthulu waves her objection away.
CTHULU
No, you are wrong. We are telling Mankind the truth, whether he likes it or not. This film will be shown to the most important men in the world. The most important and most cynical. We must slap their bored faces and scream "LOOK AT THIS!" A bleeding child is a good idea. Perhaps it would be even better if we killed the boy. I must think this over. But we definitely need more special effects! More zippiness.
J&W look at each other-- this is crazy talk, even for them.
A tremendous explosion on the other side of the room. Chaos follows. Another explosion. People fall to the floor, run around... Very much in command, Cthulu yells at the others in Arabic. MILITARY MAN take J&W by the arms and leads them out of the room.
CUT TO:
INT: HALL
The three move down hall while battle rages all around them. Shooting, running, yelling-- the Liars have attacked. Exciting stuff, lots of noise and movement.
CUT TO:
INT: HALL
CLOSE-UP of two LIARS, their faces covered by Arabic robes, except for their eyes. They run down the halls after something.
CUT TO:
INT: HALL
General fighting. We're given an idea of the ferocity of the coup attempt by what we see.
CUT TO:
INT: HALL
Officer with J&W is shot many times. Other soldiers appear and are shot as well. When all of the soldiers are dead, we see the killers are the two robed LIARS from before. They go to J&W, grab them and run off.
CUT TO:
EXT: STREET. DAY
Amidst all-out siege, J&W and two Liars run out of government building into a teeming Saru street. The Liars lead the way through the crowd, away from the building-- changing direction, left, right... until they're lost in the uproar.
CUT TO:
EXT: ALLEY. DAY
The four run down narrow alley, watched by residents. At the end of the alley, they all go right.
CUT TO:
EXT: ALLEY. DAY
Down another alley, they are stopped by a large herd of goats. Exasperated, Liars make J&W follow as they weave through the animals. Once through, they start running again, screamed at by the SHEPHERD.
CUT TO:
EXT: PATH. DAY
The four come around another corner and turn onto the narrowest path of all. At the end is a wall. Liars beckon J&W to climb it. They do with no hesitation.
CUT TO:
EXT. STREET. DAY
J&W come over wall together and land on the top of an ancient Mercedes taxicab. Liars arrive right after them. The rear door opens. Liars gesture get in. When Jack hesitates, one of the Liars sticks a gun in his face. He gets in, followed by everyone else. Taxi flies off in a squeal.
CUT TO:
INT: TAXI. DAY
J&W and one of the Liars seated in the back, the other up front next to the DRIVER. Car careens here and there. Everyone remains silent. LIAR 1 in backseat pulls off hood: a very young woman. She speaks in Arabic to those in front. LIAR2 laughs and pulls off hood--LIAR1's twin sister.
WILLA
Where are you taking us?
LIAR 1
(good English)
We're going to try and get you out of Saru. It will be hard, but there is a plan.
JACK
Who are you?
LIAR 1
Cthulu killed our father. He was a professor at the university. A philosophy professor. He was not a political man but they killed him anyway. That is my sister, and our brother is driving.
DRIVER pulls down keffiyah. He looks even younger than the girls. But he drives like a pro.
DRIVER
(grinning, Homeboy mouth)
What up?
CUT TO:
EXT: BAZZ'AF STREETS. DAY
Faraway shot of Mercedes moving through chaotic city streets. Camera pulls further back until it is almost impossible to distinguish them from the other cars.
CUT TO:
EXT: BAZZ'AF TRUCK PARK, SUNSET
The taxi pulls into an enormous open field on the edge of Bazz'af. Several hundred 16-wheelers are parked. Many people milling around. It's a small town-- people cooking, visiting, working on the trucks.. Much action too-- trucks coming and going, engines revving... all against a background of minarets and the normal early evening bustle.
The Mercedes moves slowly and bumpily across the field. After a while, it stops besides a bright blue and yellow trailer truck with Western writing on the side.
TAXI DRIVER gets out just as TRUCK DRIVER climbs down from his cab.
CUT TO:
INT: TAXI
The four look out at the drivers conferring.
JACK
What's going on?
LIAR 2
The only way we can get you out of the country now is in that truck. My brother is checking the final plans, Mr. Quinn.
WILLA
How do you know who we are?
LIAR 1
We know why Cthulu brought you here. We hope you'll go back and do what you can to stop him. Tell people! Tell them before the United Nations meeting in Vienna. By then, he will have polluted the water all around the world with his chemical and it will be too late. We will do what we can here to stop him, but it is very hard.
Reaches into her robe and takes out piece of paper.
LIAR 1
This is a list of names of the people who will probably work for him in Austria. If you can find them...
LIAR 2
This truck will be in Europe in three days.You're Americans-- your government will listen to you. They don't listen to us, because they think we're all crazy in Saru.
JACK
Why will this truck get through without being checked at the border?
LIAR 1
Because of its cargo. You will see. Besides, there is a war going on. Trucks travel the main road here one a minute up from the coast. They don't have time to stop every one and look inside.
JACK
Cthulu would really poison every person at the UN just to make his point?
LIAR 2
He will poison everyone, Mr. Quinn, as soon as he makes his announcement in Vienna. His people are ready all around the world, just waiting for his word.
WILLA
Why don't you just kill him?
Jack looks at her, astonished at the remark.
LIAR 1
(nodding)
We could, but when you kill someone like Cthulu, he becomes a saint for many people. We will fight him our way until others see that he is a stupid monster. Ah, there is our brother!
She rolls down the window and Driver sticks his head in. He speaks very fast in Arabic, always looking at J&W. Liar 1 listens, then both she and her sister laugh. J&W don't know what's going on.
LIAR 1
Everything is arranged. You will go in this truck and you will be safe. But you must hurry because he must leave in one hour. He is expected at the border and must arrive there on time.
J&W start out of the taxi.
JACK
And you're sure we won't be stopped?
LIAR 1
(looking at her sister, amused)
That is one of the only things I am sure of, Mr. Quinn.
CUT TO:
EXT. TRUCK CAMP. SUNSET
J&W, the Liars AND their brother all watch as the large Swedish-looking truck DRIVER swings open the rear doors for them. They peer inside. J&W's faces are astonished. The others know what's there so they only smile.
JACK
(quietly, utter awe)
Holy shit.
WILLA
(just as astonished)
Jack, what--
He holds up a hand to cut her off.
JACK
Before you ask, I don't know. So don't ask.
They stare at each other, then turn slowly back to look inside the truck.
CUT TO:
INT: TRUCK
All stand inside truck now, looking at a bunch of huge ominous weapons. Missiles or bombs, whatever, they are impressive and lethal looking. Some make noise (computer clicks, etc.) to tell us they are both and alive and armed.
LIAR 1
Cthulu has financed much of his work by buying weapons from one country and then selling them to others who are unable to buy them because of their politics.
JACK
What do you mean?
WILLA
Governments like America won't sell bombs toplaces like Libya or Sudan. Cthulu buys these weapons for them and ships them over like this.
Gestures all around.
JACK
Jesus Christ! And I thought he was so set on world peace.
LIAR 2
As long as it benefits him.
WILLA
So the border guards won't stop this truck because they'll know what's inside?
LIAR 1
Exactly.
Liar 1's nose grows. She's embarrassed, then laughs.
LIAR 1
What I mean is most of the time these trucks are not stopped. Nine out of ten get through.
JACK
(skeptical)
What happens when you're number ten?
LIAR 1
Then you have trouble.
JACK
(sarcastic)
Gee, I guess so.
WILLA
We have no other choice, Jack.
JACK
I know, Willa. I'm just not thrilled to know we'll be riding on top of ten megatons of nuclear possibility. And then only to the border, where they may kill us anyway.
TRUCK DRIVER
(amused)
They've never stopped me before. The odds are in our favor.
JACK
There's always a first time. What do we tell them if we do get stopped?
TRUCK DRIVER
(shrugging)
They shoot anyone who tries to smuggle things in or out of the country. My friend got stopped at the border with a thousand liters of whiskey. They took him out of the truck and shot him right there.
WILLA
Then why are you taking a chance to help us?
TRUCK DRIVER
(starts out of the trailer)
Because he was a very good friend of mine. But you have to decide whether or not you're coming now. I'm due at the border tomorrow morning. The guards get very suspicious when you don't arrive on time. I have to leave soon.
Jack looks around, then pats a weapon as if it were a dog.
JACK
What the hell, I always wanted to be a star. If they catch us, we'll just press one of these buttons and supernova.
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT. NIGHT
Bedouin FAMILY sitting outside their tent in the middle of the desert. A campfire is burning, the women are preparing dinner. Off in the far distance is a road. Far away we hear the sound of a large truck jamming down the road. Headlights appear and all heads turn to watch it pass. Things grow silent again and the people turn back to the fire.
CUT TO:
INT: TRAILER
J&W sitting on the floor of the trailer. They are playing cards, but are so nervous about the bombs that they keep the cards on their laps, afraid if they put them the wrong place they might set something off. Suddenly the truck hits a big bump. Jack freezes, terrified. Willa closes her eyes tightly and pulls her head down into her shoulders like a turtle.
CUT TO:
EXT: COURTYARD, MILITARY HEADQUARTERS. DAY
Close-up on face of LIAR 1: Total fear one second, pain the next, then nothing-- she's dead. Pull back. She falls to the ground. Already lying there is her sister. Pull back further. COLONEL turns to BOY TAXI DRIVER, held by 2 SOLDIERS. He's seen the murder of his sisters. Colonel says something in Arabic. Boy shakes head no. Colonel nods to soldiers who take him to the wall. Boy looks very young and scared. Soldiers prepare to shoot him. He breaks down and starts screaming. Colonel stops the proceedings and goes over to listen to his confession.
CUT TO:
INT: TRAILER
Jack & Willa are lying on the floor of the trailer, Willa's head on J's stomach.
JACK
You propositioned me.
Willa raises up to look at him.
WILLA
(indignant)
I asked if you'd like to go for a drink. That's not a proposition-- it was an invitation!
JACK
I didn't know you. I'd never seen you before, but you waltz right up and say Hey there!
WILLA
(skeptical)
I did not say 'Hey.' And excuse me, that's not allowed? Men have been doing it to women for two million years.
JACK Of course it's allowed. It's just ...uncommon. At the time I thought I was the most aggressive person in the world. Then I met you.
WILLA
(appalled)
You're joking, right? Were you really turned off when I came up to you that first day? If I hadn't, we never would have met!
Jack's grinning-- he is kidding, but she can't see him.
JACK
You don't have to apologize; I like obnoxious women.
Angry, Willa sits up for real this time and looks at him. Seeing he's been joking, she falls back to where she was.
WILLA
What do you think's going to happen to us?
JACK
I don't know. But I'll tell you something: I want to stop thinking about the future. After these last weeks, I'm trying to stay in the now. Not the last now, not the next; this now. You're my favorite person in the world. Sitting here, surrounded by fucking bombs, talking about how we first met... It's crazy but I like it. I don't care what happens in an hour. It doesn't matter now. This does, this hour does.
WILLA
That's all lies are, you know? Worrying about the future. You lie so the future will work out in your favor.
JACK
Exactly! I never thought of that. You are a clever woman.
WILLA
(settling back in her original position)
All right, so, I came up and asked if you wanted to have a drink. What did you think when I did that?
JACK
Very cool. I thought this is a cool woman. What's her name?
His nose starts to grow, but Willa's sitting contentedly with her eyes closed so she doesn't see it.
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT. DAY
Truck moving fast across desert.
CUT TO:
INT: TRAILER
Jack and Willa lie on the floor of the trailer, asleep in each other's arms. They're awakened by the truck's braking hard and the commotion that goes with a sudden stop. When they've stopped, they look at each other worried. Something bad's about to happen. Both look around for weapons, but there's nothing to pick up.
WILLA
(scared, looking at the door)
No matter what happens, just know I love you.
JACK
I was going to say the same thing.
Both of them tense as the doors swing open. Outside are the driver, the scientist Andrew Lumsden, and an Arab in a full keffiyah.
JACK
What's going on?
DRIVER
We've got another passenger. Hurry up. We've got to move.
WILLA
Wait a minute-- I know you! You're the--
LUMSDEN
(climbing into the trailer)
The smell doctor. They kidnapped me too. Nice meeting you.
Turns to Arab outside.
LUMSDEN
Nusrat, thank you so much.
Arab smiles to him, waves and goes back to a motorcycle parked next to the truck. He gets on, starts it and roars off across the desert.
DRIVER
Everybody ready? Time to move.
He swings the doors shut on the trailer.
CUT TO:
INT: TRAILER
Jack, Willa and Lumsden are sitting on the floor, talking. They're moving again.
JACK
Cthulu said the formula came to him the night he had his vision! He lied to us!
WILLA
(ironic)
How come his nose didn't grow?
LUMSDEN
Our lab discovered the formula six months ago by accident. We were working on a project for the US government. God only knows how Cthulu found out about it.
WILLA
That doesn't matter now. The more important question is, what's the antidote?
LUMSDEN
(shaking his head)
There is none. Once ingested, a very specific and irreversible biochemical process goes on in either the cerebral cortex or thalamus, we haven't figured out which yet. That's part of our problem. Once it enters the body, you're--
JACK
Doomed.
LUMSDEN
(nodding)
Doomed is a good word. What's worse is the materials needed to make it are available anywhere. You don't need fancy lab facilities to put them together. A lot easier than creating Bubonic Plague.
JACK
(amazed)
You can do that too in the lab?
LUMSDEN
Absolutely. A great deal of germ warfare research is concentrated on the olfactory sense-- smelling. It's the easiest way to get something into a body.
WILLA
(sarcastic)
Fun through science.
Lumsden shrugs.
LUMSDEN
Somebody's going to do the research. Better us than the lunatics.
Jack & Willa look at each other, amazed.
JACK
Well, looks like those loonies won this round, huh?
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT. DAY
The truck speeds by. It passes. A few silent beats, then we see very far behind it dots on the road catching up. They grow until they are three cars and two motorcycles speeding after the truck. As they close in, we note they're military vehicles.
CUT TO:
INT: TRUCK CAB. DAY
Driver looks in rearview mirror once, no reaction. Then it dawns on him what's there. He grabs shift knob and rams the engine into a higher gear to get moving.
DRIVER
Shit.
Looks in rearview again. Reaches behind him to slide open window separating cab from back of truck. Over his shoulder he shouts
DRIVER
I think they found us! Someone's coming.
JACK
(o.s.)
How could they? What are you going to do?
DRIVER
(staring into mirror)
Try and outrun them to the border.
JACK
(o.s.)
Can you do that? Is your truck fast enough?
DRIVER
(constantly checking mirror)
No.
JACK
(o.s.)
Then we're fucked.
DRIVER
We are fucked. Correct.
CUT TO:
INT: JEEP. DAY
Colonel who killed Liars is talking on portable telephone. Speaks in Arabic. Subtitles.
COLONEL
What's the problem? We'll just blow it up. We've got a bazooka. One shot and they're kebab!
Listens. Eyes widen.
COLONEL
That's in there? Why didn't you tell me before? Of course I know how valuable it is. What? I don't know-- we'll have to catch up with them and... I don't know. I have to think about it.
Turns off the phone and taps himself on the head with it. Says in English
COLONEL
Shit!
CUT TO:
INT:TRUCK CAB. DAY
Driver is still looking in rearview mirror.
DRIVER
The one thing we have going for us is they must know what we are carrying by now.
JACK
(o.s.)
So what?
DRIVER
They won't shoot at us because they'll damage the load. They can't sell bombs with bullet holes in them.
JACK
(o.s.)
What'll they do?
Driver looks in mirror.
DRIVER
(looking in mirror)
Try and stop us. Try and get on. Hold tight, they're coming.
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT ROAD. DAY
One Army car accelerates away from others and up to the left of the truck. One motorcycle goes right. SOLDIER in passenger's seat opens door in preparation for jumping onto running board. Truck veers hard right into car, bashing it off road. We watch car self-destruct. Then truck veers left and smashes motorcycle for same effect.
CUT TO:
INT: MILITARY CAR. DAY
Colonel, looking angry, is on the pocket telephone again.
COLONEL
I don't care if they're in the south! If you want me to catch this damned truck, get them up here fast!
Disconnects. Says to driver
COLONEL
Idiots! What do they think we are, acrobats?
DRIVER looks at him, eyes off the road
COLONEL
(flinching)
Look out!
Through the windshield, we see truck has braked directly in front of us. We swerve to avoid it. Car goes out of control and veers dangerously around truck, off into the desert. Rights itself and returns to the road.
CUT TO
EXT: DESERT ROAD
Aerial shot of truck speeding along, chased by only one car. Colonel's car is way behind, just returning to road. Gradually move to other side of truck to reveal a motorcycle, riderless, flying off the road into the desert. The RIDER is hanging onto a ladder up the rear of the truck. Reaches across to door handle and starts to open it.
CUT TO
INT: TRUCK CAB. DAY
Driver is smiling while looking into rearview mirror. He talks over his shoulder to those in back.
DRIVER
There's only one car left. Maybe we have a chance.
JACK
(o.s.,loud and scared)
Willa, the door! Get out of the way!
Driver tries to turn and look through window to back. Truck veers, he fights to control it.
DRIVER
What is it? What's happening?
CUT TO:
INT: TRAILER
Soldier is standing just inside back of trailer, gun on Jack, Willa and Lumsden. Rear doors are open, swinging back and forth, light pours in, then dark again. Hands are up, backs to the machinery as Soldier approaches. Out the back, we can see the other military car keeping pace with the truck.
JACK
Take it easy. We're not going to do anything.
Soldier gestures with gun for them to move forward slowly. They do. When they're a few feet away, he gestures for them to stop.
DRIVER
(o.s.)
What's going on?
JACK
One of them got in.
Soldier raises gun threateningly, not understanding what they're saying, angry they're talking.
DRIVER
(o.s., loud)
Oh God! Get ready!
A moment later the three are thrown forward as the truck slams on its brakes.
CUT TO:
INT: TRUCK CAB. DAY
From driver's perspective, through the windshield we see that two hundred feet in front of us is a gigantic sandstorm. It completely obliterates everything out there. Driver shifts down, doing all he can to slow before entering this Hell.
CUT TO:
INT: MILITARY CAR. DAY
Through a different windshield, we see the back of the truck swerve and brake close in front of us. We cannot see why because the back of the truck takes up our whole view. Soldier driving car is doing exactly the same thing as the truck driver-- braking, downshifting... trying not to hit the truck. Colonel is screaming in Arabic. Driver is trying to keep control.
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT. DAY
From high above, watch as the truck and cars drive straight into the storm and disappear.
CUT TO:
INT: TRUCK
View of storm through the windshield. No visibility at all.
CUT TO:
INT: TRAILER
Jack and Soldier wrestling. Exciting fight, rough, full of action. The back doors swinging open and closed. We can just see one of the military cars driving right behind the truck. The men wrestle close to the doors. Jack is about to be pushed out. Willa comes up behind soldier and hits him on the head. He backhands her away, but Jack is saved from falling out. Willa is on the ground. Jack and Soldier go on fighting. Lumsden doesn't move. Soldier finishes Jack off. He ends up lying on his back near Willa. Soldier picks up rifle and aims it at them.
JACK
(watching soldier)
Thank you, love.
WILLA
He was going to let you fall! You would've been killed!
Soldier speaks Arabic, but gestures so we see he wants Willa to move away from Jack. She does but not far. The trailer doors keep swinging, noise from outside, the storm... Stalemate.
After tense moments, Willa stands slowly and starts to do a slow, sexy striptease. All of the men are amazed. She looks at Soldier the whole time, speaking to him in slow, halting Arabic. We see what she's saying in subtitles, or simply by the way she's moving.
JACK
Willa, what the hell are you doing?
WILLA
You're a strong man. I like that. I like soldiers. I like the way you fought him.
Soldier points gun at her, but he's confused and fascinated too.
WILLA
Do you like me? Do you want to touch me? I'd like that.
Close-up of Soldier's face-- hungry.
CUT TO:
Close-up of Willa's hand unbuttoning shirt.
CUT TO:
Close-up of Jack
JACK
Jesus, Willa!
CUT TO:
INT: TRAILER
Willa's hands, unbuttoning. Move slowly up her shirt to her throat, then face. Her nose is a foot long. Soldier sees this but too late-- she steps forward and kicks him between the legs. He goes down.
WILLA
Hurry, Jack! Help me get him out!
The three throw Soldier out back of truck.
CUT TO:
INT: MILITARY CAR. DAY
POV through car windshield. See the back of the truck directly in front of us, the storm raging.Then big THUMP! Instantly the whole view is the face and body of soldier from truck. A shocked look on his face. Sees Colonel, tries to salute. Loses his grip and sliding off front of car, disappears.
CUT TO:
INT: TRUCK CAB. DAY
Driver's face-- worry, concentration. He sees something ahead and begins to smile.
DRIVER
(shouting to the back)
We're all right!
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT. DAY
The truck and then the military car break out of the sandstorm at high speed right at us. Very loud-- storm blowing, truck jamming, all sound, speed and chaos.
CUT TO:
INT: TRAILER. DAY
J&W, Lumsden sitting on floor of trailer, exhausted after fight with soldier. They're framed by the open doors behind them.
LUMSDEN
That was brilliant.
WILLA
Shows you what an imagination and a nice set of breasts can do for you.
Gunshots from outside. They're pinned down as bullets start to hit inside trailer.
JACK
(astonished)
They're shooting at us!
Looks around at the cargo.
JACK
They're shooting at us?
WILLA
Are they nuts? There're bombs in here!
LUMSDEN
Maybe they don't care. Uh oh-- look behind the car!
Gestures with his hand out there. Far back on the horizon, three blips become three helicopters coming up fast on the truck. Bullets hitting everywhere inside the trailer. Everyone pinned down. Helicopters getting closer. Jack gets to his knees and waddles over to the bombs. Starts to unscrew one. Aghast, Willa goes over to stop him.
WILLA
Jack, don't do that! You don't know what you're doing. It could blow up!
A spray of bullets pins them down again. Jack gets up, furious.
JACK
So what? They're trying to kill us. The only thing we can do is fight back with what's here.
He holds up a piece of the bomb he's unscrewed. Gestures around them.
JACK
The only thing we can do before those helicopters get here is maybe take out that car. At least that's something.
He finishes pulling another piece of bomb off. Throws it out the back towards the military car. It hits with a loud bang and the car swerves dangerously.
JACK
Like that!
He goes for another piece of bomb. Willa is frozen, undecided.
JACK
(working crazily)
Willa, there's nothing left!
They look at each other, at Lumsden. He's right. The other two join him pulling the bomb apart. A free piece in his hand, Jack stops a moment even while bullets fly around them. Grabs her arm.
JACK
I love you.
WILLA
I love you too.
JACK
Say "I do."
She pauses. Understands. Big smile.
WILLA
I do.
JACK
I do too. Let's go.
Moving away, he throws piece out back. Follow with bullets flying, them feverishly unscrewing bombs... Helicopters fly in close and things get worse and crazier. Continue until a bullet grazes Willa's head and she goes down. She touches the wound then roars
WILLA
How the hell did we ever get here?
Stands up, turns to the bombs, looking frantically for something to throw. CLOSE-UP of small, innocent looking black object connected to top of bomb.
WILLA
Shoot me in the head? I don't think so!
Rips object off bomb and running to the back, heaves it out.
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT ROAD. DAY
SLOW MOTION progress of black thing as it flies. From this perspective, we see the helicopters are almost to the truck now. Then as the object descends--
CUT TO:
INT: TRAILER. DAY
J&W, Lumsden freeze as TREMENDOUS explosion goes off behind them. The truck is shaken violently or even knocked off the road. Behind them, a mushroom cloud like an atomic bomb goes up, obliterating the whole background for seconds. Truck barely stops. All kinds of crazy things rain down on top of them. When the skies clear, nothing is left behind-- no military car, helicopters, nothing.
J&W stare at each other, astonished, slack-jawed.
JACK
What the hell did you throw?
She puts a hand over her mouth like a naughty girl. Shrugs. They turn back to watch.
LUMSDEN
Maybe you should work for us.
CUT TO:
EXT: DESERT. DAY
Slow motion of mushroom cloud. Freeze on one frame. In the background, a clicking sound like photographs being taken.
CUT TO:
EXT DESERT. DAY
Series of single shots of the scene, getting smaller as camera goes higher in the air. Clicking sound continues. Finally scene is so small it's lost in the desert.
Picture changes. from the new perspective we see that mushroom cloud on the desert is being photographed from miles high. Now we see the whole desert, then the continent, the Western Hemisphere... We're out in space.
CUT TO:
EXT: OUTER SPACE
Spy satellite orbiting the earth. The only sound the clicking camera. Satellite sails by, then out of view. We stay on black space and twinkling stars, clicking continues then dies away.
CUT TO:
EXT: SCHWEIZERHAUS RESTAURANT. DAY
Sounds of German being spoken, oom-pah music, glasses clinking. Fade in on photo of mushroom cloud we've just witnessed. Pull back to reveal huge outdoor beer garden/restaurant in Vienna's Prater amusement park. Hundreds of people around, eating, talking... Show the goings on while we hear
BARR
(o.s., woman's voice, American)
When did it happen?
FLOSSMANN
(o.s., man's voice, German accent)
Five days ago.
BARR
(o.s.)
And no one knows what it was?
FLOSSMANN
(o.s.)
We're guessing some kind of nuclear test.
LEWIS
(o.s., man's voice, American accent, exasperated)
Oh Great, Cthulu has a bomb now? Let me see those pictures.
Hands offer a bunch of photographs. They're taken and spread across the table for all to see. Photos of mushroom cloud. Then Arab faces with Pinocchio noses. Some funny, others sad or bizarre.
MALOZEMOFF
(o.s. woman's voice, Russian accent) What is this? A joke?
Female hand points to a picture. A dog with the same Pinocchio nose.
LEWIS
(o.s.)
Who the hell knows what's going on in the wacko country? Maybe Cthulu's having a big nose contest.
Male hand picks up the photo and brings it to his face for a better look. LEWIS. Business suit-- government type. Hands picture to BARR. She is middle aged, patrician, well dressed. Sitting next to her are Flossmann and Malozemoff, both diplomat types.
BARR
Cthulu is always up to something, but our intelligence reports coming out of there are so confused and contradictory that we can never really get a clear idea of what's happening. The same thing happened with Saddam Hussein before he invaded Kuwait. We know that that scientist Lumsden is there, that's for sure. But other than that...Too many reports, too few facts.
FLOSSMANN
That's why we wanted to talk to you about this. We need all the help we can get. We are hearing from too many different sources that he is going to try something at that UN meeting.
BARR
Irene?
MALOZEMOFF
(shaking her head)
It would be very effective for him: every major leader will be there. Whatever happened, he would get a great deal of publicity. He is a megalomaniac-- they like to talk, and the more people who are listening...
FLOSSMANN
And that is our problem: It is a perfect platform with a captive audience.
LEWIS
Especially if they are captives. It'll be like the takeover of the Japanese embassy in Peru.
He looks at Barr. She picks up one of the photos and taps it against her fingernail.
MALOZEMOFF
I've studied Cthulu for fifteen years. From when he was up in the mountains of Saru with seven zealots and one rifle between them. He is dangerous not because he's a tyrant, but because he's genuinely mad. I guarantee you that. These pictures are telling us everything, we just don't know how to look at them.
BARR
One crazy man says "God spoke to me!" The second crazy man looks at him and says "I did not!" Cthulu told one of our agents that. He loves jokes. He likes to laugh.
She looks at the others with a small, deadly smile on her face. Silence all around.
CUT TO:
EXT: AUTOBAHN BORDER STATION. DAY
Border crossing into Austria. Early morning. Majestic mountains in background. Approaching are two black Mercedes sedans. When they stop, inches from us, the license plates are Austrian diplomatic "WD." Camera moves slowly up over grill, hood, to windshield.
BORDER GUARD goes to driver's window and waits for it to buzz down. At the wheel is Djebeli. Although it's first light and overcast, he's wearing sunglasses the color of the car's tinted windows.
GUARD
Passports, please.
DJEBELI
(not moving, bored)
We are diplomats. Is it really necessary to show you our passports?
GUARD
(tightening, angry)
Diplomats have passports. Show them to me.
Djebeli makes a big show of sighing and shaking his head. Hands over everyone's passport. GUARD 2 comes up and joins Guard 1. Guard 1 holds up one passport for the other to see.
GUARD 1
(raising his eyebrows)
Saru.
Other Guard smirks and shakes his head. Guard 1 hands back passports.
GUARD 1
What is the purpose of your visit?
DJEBELI
(a beat, looks at Guard)
Pleasure. Water sports.
The minute he says this his nose begins to grow. Someone in the car speaks sharply in Arabic, another laughs. The window slides up. Car pulls out of the station followed closely by the other Mercedes. Guards stand watching them.
GUARD 2
Saru! Terrorists in Mercedes. They can just drive in andout of here with anything they want because they have those passports. Diplomatic Immunity. What shit! Can you imagine how many times they've brought in guns and things. But we can't touch them. I hate diplomatic immunity.
Other guard slaps him on the back and they walk off together.
CUT TO:
EXT: AMERICAN EMBASSY. DAY
CLOSE UP of young American Marine GUARD in full dress uniform, shaking head emphatically "No!" Pull back and there's Jack & Willa looking messy, tired, angry.
GUARD
I'm sorry, Sir. But I cannot let you in without an appointment.
JACK
(totally frustrated)
But we're American citizens! I have to talk to the Ambassador!
GUARD
I can't let you in, Sir. You don't have an appointment and you don't have passports.
JACK
For Christ's sake!
He turns to Willa and they talk urgently together. Guard stands impassive but still blocking entrance.
A limousine pulls up in front of Embassy. Barr (CIA chief) & her assistant Lewis get out, deep in conversation. They walk towards entrance of embassy.
JACK
(frustrated, very loud to Guard)
Look, we've just come from Saru! You know Saru? Cthulu? Terrorism? You've got to let us in or else you're personally going to be responsible for some very bad stuff.
Barr & Lewis exchange sharp looks. They stop and watch disheveled Jack closely.
GUARD
(looking at Barr, knows who she is)
I'm sorry. I cannot allow you into the Embassy without an appointment or a valid United States
passport.
JACK
Okay! Then I'd like to go in and apply for a new one. How's that? Is that reason enough? I lost mine and need a new one--
As he says this, his nose begins to grow fast. Barr and Lewis see and react immediately.
WILLA
(sensing trouble)
Jack-
Barr steps forward and takes Jack by the arm. Starts with him towards the door. Lewis takes Willa and moves her along with the others.
GUARD
Are you--
BARR
I'll take responsibility for them, Corporal Ater.
Guard snaps to attention.
GUARD
Yes Ma'am!
The four enter embassy.
CUT TO:
INT: EMBASSY OFFICE. DAY
J&W are at the end of their story, surrounded by Barr, Lewis, and four other MEN.
BARR
And Cthulu himself said he was going to put it in everyone's drink at the UN meeting?
JACK
(flipping out)
I've told you three times! Yes! And it makes your nose grow if you lie. And I've shown you how it works and what the hell else can I tell you?
Cthulu thinks he'll save the world by making everyone tell the truth.
Barr looks at Lewis, who steps forward waving paper at Jack.
LEWIS
You know all the men on this list, Mr. Quinn?
Jack slaps his head, at the end of his patience.
JACK
Yes! Yes! Yes!
Willa puts her hand on his shoulder to calm him.
WILLA
We met them all in New York, and then again in Saru several times.
BARR
One of our problems is that we only recognize two of the five men on the list. If what you're saying is true, we don't have enough time to find out who the others are. Would you help us identify them?
WILLA
Of course! That's why we came here.
SECRETARY enters room and whispers in Barr's ear.
BARR
Okay. Thanks.
Secretary leaves.
BARR
(worried)
The President's plane just landed.
Silence in the room. Everyone staring at Jack & Willa.
BARR
We've got to move.
Everyone jumps up, ready to go.
BARR
One last question-- What did you do out there? How did you cause that explosion? Even our satellite picked it up!
WILLA
(thinks, a beat)
Beginner's luck.
The women smile at each other and everyone leaves.
CUT TO:
EXT: VIENNA AIRPORT
Place is bustling with police, helicopters, Army commandos... Looks like a war zone. TV ANNOUNCER walks into picture and looks at us as if we're the camera.
ANNOUNCER
As you can see, security at Vienna airport is extremely tight. But it isn't every day that the Presidents of the United States, Russia, the Prime Minister of England and even the small Republic of Saru gather together in one place for common purpose.
Looks offstage at something.
ANNOUNCER
I've just been told General Cthulu's plane has landed and in a few moments, will arrive at this gate. Hopefully, we'll be able to have an exclusive interview with the controversial head of state who will be delivering one of the keynote addresses of this meeting.
Cut away from announcer as giant airplane looms into view over his shoulder. The familiar logo of Saru Airlines on the side of the plane. Taxiing to the gate, it stops and the engines whine down.
CUT TO:
EXT: UNITED NATIONS BUILDING. SUNSET
Far shot of building, gradually focusing in on entrance. Large crowds leaving at the end of the day. Picture goes out of focus, then sharpens again. We're looking through binoculars which move here and there over the crowd. They stop abruptly on a familiar man in a Borsalino hat talking to other men. Another comes up and joins the group.
JACK
(o.s.)
That's El Rouby. The guy wearing the ugly hat.
WILLA
(o.s.)
There's Sadr. Coming up on his left.
Sadr & El Rouby say good-bye to others and walk away. They go to nearby parking lot and a black Mercedes. Sadr unlocks door. Looks a moment in our direction and says something to El Rouby.
JACK
(o.s., worried)
Uh oh! Can they see us?
LEWIS
(o.s.)
I don't know. We'll see in a minute.
Sadr and El Rouby get into car and drive out of parking lot. Our engine starts and we follow at a distance. Viennese rush hour traffic. Sadr turns onto the "Reichsbrucke" bridge towards center of town. We follow.
CUT TO:
EXT: REICHSBRUCKE. SUNSET
Bad traffic-- stop and go across the bridge. At the other end, it's gridlock. Mercedes is five cars ahead. We hear the clanging of a bell. A yellow repair trolley passes us on the unimpeded tracks running down the middle of the street. It stops ahead for a red light. Pedestrians cross up there, limiting our view of the Mercedes. Trolley bell clangs again and it moves away down the track while we stay stuck. No cars are moving. Certain drivers get out to see what's the problem. We see it's the Mercedes that is stopped.
LEWIS
(o.s.)
Something's wrong with.... Wait a minute. Wait-a-minute!
A door slams. Lewis gets out and walk towards the Mercedes. He's back fast and angry.
LEWIS
(looking into car)
They're gone. They left their car in the middle of the street and took off!
CUT TO:
EXT: REICHSBRUCKE. SUNSET
From POV of the driver's seat in the Mercedes, we see Jack, Willa, Lewis and Flossmann running towards us through stopped cars. They look into the car and their facial expressions tell all. The traffic is frozen solid. Jack looks in, then away.
JACK
They got in that tram! The yellow one that just went by. Come on!
All turn and run towards tram.
CUT TO:
EXT: REICHSBRUCKE. SUNSET
From high above, watch the four people run in and out of the line of cars after the yellow tram moving far ahead. Sounds of panting, car horns, traffic noise. But it's futile and they soon stop, knowing there's no chance. Street sounds. Then another-- the clang of another trolley bell somewhere near. They turn to look. A regular red and white Viennese trolley going in the right direction slows for a stop nearby. They run for it as the doors open. People get on and off. The four jump on.
CUT TO:
INT: TROLLEY
Flossmann stands talking to the trolley DRIVER while J&W and Lewis watch what happens. Lewis is talking urgently on a pocket telephone. Flossmann throws up his hands and walks to them. All the while the trolley is not moving.
FLOSSMANN
He says he won't follow them. He doesn't care if we're the police. Nothing!
Lewis looks at him, drops the phone into his pocket and stands. He pulls out a large pistol and walks to the front of the car. People in the car cower and try to hide. He puts the gun to the driver's head.
LEWIS
(in German)
Get going or I'll crack your skull.
Driver starts to protest. Lewis hits him on the head hard enough to show he means it. The passengers are transfixed by all this.
CUT TO:
EXT: REICHSBRUCKE. SUNSET
Trolley doors open and passengers flood out. As soon as the last one is gone, the doors close and trolley takes off.
CUT TO:
INT: TROLLEY. NIGHT
Inside empty tram, the four are crowded at the front, looking over the driver's shoulder for the yellow tram. Way in the back is one OLD WOMAN dressed in ratty loden clothing with a ratty-looking dog.
WOMAN
(shouting in German)
I paid full fare! You take me to my stop or I'll call the police!
FLOSSMANN
(without turning to look at her)
We are the police.
Stopped for only a moment, she continues to shout on and off throughout the scene. No one pays any attention.
JACK
Do you see them?
FLOSSMANN
No, but they got a big start. Also right across the bridge the track starts curving all over the place so we're going to have to be lucky to know where they're going.
JACK
What'd you tell the driver to get him to go?
FLOSSMANN
I told him they were Arabs who came to blow up the Opera House. Also that Lewis would shoot him if he didn't drive.
Driver turns around and says to everyone
DRIVER
(angry as hell, in German)
Damned Arabs!
WILLA
There it is! I see it!
Through front windshield, the back of the yellow tram shows vaguely in the dark and city lights ahead.
CUT TO:
EXT; STREET. NIGHT
Two POLICEMEN sitting in patrol car at a traffic light. Suddenly the two trams go hammering by, straight through the red light. Driver screeches off after trams. Passenger reaches for the radio to report this. Driver switches on siren.
CUT TO:
EXT: STREET. NIGHT
From POV of someone standing on the sidewalk, watch the yellow tram followed by the red one flying down the tracks and then away into the distance. The wheels throw sparks off in all directions. A moment later the police car comes after them, siren blaring.
CUT TO:
EXT: HOT-DOG STAND. NIGHT
WHORE, BUM, STREET WORKER in bright orange outfit stand at a hot-dog stand eating, ignoring each other. Two trams fly by, their bells clanging. The three people look up in surprise at the spectacle and the sound. When the trams have passed, followed by the police car, the three look at each other and shake their heads.
WHORE
(grinning, mimicking tram bells)
Ding Ding!
BUM
(hoisting his beer)
Ding Ding!
WORKER
Ding Ding Ding Ding--
They start to riff on each other and laughing it up, go crazy ding-dinging.
CUT TO:
INT: YELLOW TRAM. NIGHT
From POV of driver, we look through windshield and watch a traffic light in front of us turn red. Tram doesn't slow although a car up there starts across track directly in front of us. Driver clangs warning bell and car driver looks up-- horrified. Car moves to get away but is still hit and knocked off the tracks.
CUT TO:
EXT: STREET. NIGHT
Hit car spins in a circle across the road and comes to a precarious stop in the middle of everything. Driver jumps out and watches as the trams and police car disappear down the way. Cars around him start honking and driver screams at them as if they're to blame for all this.
CUT TO:
INT: RED TRAM. NIGHT
At the rear of J&W's tram, OLD WOMAN who would not be put off is sitting there, arms crossed, fury brewing.
WOMAN
(angry, in German, subtitles)
You should be ashamed! Kidnapping an old woman! When I tell the police--
Flossmann turns around
FLOSSMANN
(in German, annoyed)
We are the police!
Woman gives him a look and turns to the window, unconvinced.
WOMAN
Ashamed!
Move up the aisle to where J&W are sitting. Through the front windows, they're watching the yellow tram move along.
JACK
(ironic)
We could be in New York having dinner. (A beat) At Restaurant Bazz'af!
WILLA
(smiling)
But maybe it's better being here, saving the world.
He smiles and kisses her cheek.
JACK
(joking)
From big noses.
They look at each other with great affection, then turn again to see the chase.
CUT TO:
EXT: STREET. NIGHT
Both trams go around a corner at high speed. Wheels sending yellow sparks off into the dark. They're now followed by three police cars, sirens and lights going.
CUT TO:
EXT: RINGSTRASSE. NIGHT
Tram and police car cavalcade fly down Vienna's most beautiful street-- in front of the illuminated Parliament, National Theater, City Hall. The place is as romantic as hell but none of these people see any of it.
CUT TO:
EXT: REICHSBRUCKE. NIGHT
Trams and police cars start up one side of bridge. In front of them is the night-glowing United Nations complex of buildings.
CUT TO:
EXT: TRACKS. NIGHT
Close-up of tram wheels flying over track. Suddenly they start to wobble from side to side. More sparks flying up.
CUT TO:
EXT: TRACKS. NIGHT
From POV of red tram, we watch as the yellow one starts to pitch from side to side, then finally derail in a chaos of noise, sound and dust.
CUT TO:
EXT: TRACKS. NIGHT
Close-up of tram wheels, only not it's the red tram now braking to avoid hitting the yellow. Pull back to see they can't stop and the red one plows into back of yellow which is pushed forward as the red derails too.
CUT TO:
EXT: REICHSBRUCKE. NIGHT
Both trams stopped in the middle of the bridge. Smoke coming from both, loud hissing sounds, total confusion all around. Police screech up behind, jump out of their cars, guns ready. Traffic on the bridge stopped. People on both trams get out, dazed. Flossmann and Lewis show police their credentials, then run over to yellow tram. J&W follow. Saruvians step out looking shell shocked but holding their passports up. Cops grab them.
SADR
(screaming)
Diplomats! We are diplomats! You cannot do anything.
One COP steps off tram holding guns Saruvians used. Shows others.
EL ROUBY
We have immunity!
Jack goes up to Sadr.
JACK
I told them everything, Sadr. About the noses, Cthulu's plans, everything. They know it all. It's over.
Sadr, trying to be cool and calm, looks at his watch and smiles.
SADR
It is just the opposite, Mr. Quinn. It is all beginning. Nothing can stop it. And nothing can be done to us because of our diplomatic immunity. You lose. You lose in a big way. You should have stayed in Saru. At least you would have made a lot of money.
Lewis, Flossmann, Willa and Old Woman from tram come up.
LEWIS
I'll tell you about immunity.
Moves close to Sadr, knees him in the balls. He staggers, Lewis props him up.
LEWIS
If you disappear, it doesn't do you much good.
EL ROUBY
(nervously)
You can't--
FLOSSMANN
(firmly)
We can. We will. Where is this liquid? This chemical? What is Cthulu's plan?
SADR
It doesn't make any difference if I tell you anyway. It is too late to stop it. The Bimplitz Reservoir in Lower Austria. It is a very remote place, maybe two hours away in the mountains.
He looks at his watch.
SADR
(smiling slyly)
Even if you left now, it would take you too long to get there.
FLOSSMANN
(getting it first, horrified)
They're going to do the whole city! That's the main reservoir for Vienna, not just the UN. It's two million people! They're going to poison two million people.
Sadr nods, smiling.
SADR
(nasty, triumphant)
Maybe they are pouring it into the water right this minute. Only a little. It is very strong. I am sure they are already there.
Silence. All freeze as Sadr's nose begins to grow.
JACK
He's lying! Look at his nose! There's still time!
Held by cops, Sadr and El Rouby watch as J&W, Lewis and Flossman run for police cars. Standing a little apart from all this, the old woman and her dog. She watches cars drive off, then the Arabs get hustled into police cars. Shaking her head, she sits down on tram step, opens one of her many bags and takes out two sandwiches. Hands one to the dog. Both eat, watching the clean up of the wreck.
CUT TO:
EXT: BIMPLITZ MEADOW. NIGHT
Silence, except for country noises-- water rushing, cow bells tinkling... Then sounds of two men speaking Arabic and their footsteps. Flashlight beams crisscross ground, then up onto metal fence with sign reading (in German) 'BIMPLITZ WATER RESOURCE/ VIENNA SECTOR.' Light continues on fence as one MAN unlocks gate. They go through. A hundred meters ahead loom large buildings in vivid, ghostly light.
When men are almost to the buildings (which back onto the mountains), a helicopter pops up from behind these mountains and swoops down towards them. A floodlight on the copter illuminates the ground, searching. Men run for buildings, their own flashlights small beams across the dark ground. As they reach the building, helicopter lights find them and stay on them as they enter.
CUT TO:
INT: RESERVOIR BUILDING
Inside the building, two MEN run directly at camera: Djebeli is one, the other unknown. Djebeli is carrying a plastic bottle containing what looks like blue liquid wash soap. They stop and look at a diagram 2nd man is carrying. He points to a spiral staircase nearby and they climb.
CUT TO:
INT: RESERVOIR BUILDING
Same place. Door bangs open. Jack, Lewis and Flossmann all come in together, looking everywhere for the bad guys. They stop.
LEWIS
Split up. This place is fucking huge and they gotta know where they're going.
FLOSSMANN
I wish we did.
Lewis points ways for Jack and Flossman. They all spread out in different directions.
CUT TO:
INT: RESERVOIR BUILDING
From ground level, we look straight up through an enormous metal maze of pipes and catwalks. Way up high, someone is running loudly across one of these metal bridges. The sound echoes everywhere.
CUT TO:
INT: STAIRCASE
Jack climbing steep staircase as fast as he can. Stops a moment to rest, hears footsteps above. Looks up, sees something, climbs faster.
CUT TO:
INT: CATWALK
Flossmann chases Djebeli and 2nd Man across catwalk. 2nd stops, turns to fight. Djebeli runs on, carrying plastic bottle. Flossmann and 2nd go at each other. Their battle is furious and dangerous so high up.
CUT TO:
INT: HALLWAY
Lewis runs down hallway in one direction. As soon as he's gone, Djebeli, who has been hiding around a corner, comes out and goes in the other direction.
CUT TO:
INT: CAULDRON
As if from the bottom of an enormous swimming pool, shoot up through very blue water at floodlights glaring down on us from above.
CUT TO:
INT: CATWALK
On a catwalk high above the cauldron, Djebeli runs up. He takes paper out of his pocket, consults it, looks at painted markings on wall. This is the place. The sound of someone running, but far away. Djebeli hurriedly twists the cap off the bottle he's carrying. Jack tackles him from behind and the two go down. They struggle for the bottle. Finally it flies out of Djebeli's hand and falls towards cauldron.
CUT TO:
INT: ABOVE CAULDRON
In slow motion, bottle turns over and over as it falls. Very bright liquid--- bright orange-- swirls out, like shiny ribbon. Move up and away from bottle falling, up up to catwalk high above where both Jack and Djebeli are frozen, watching it happen.
CUT TO:
INT: INSIDE CAULDRON
From POV bottom of cauldron again, see splash of orange liquid on top of blue water, then bottle hitting surface. Orange everywhere, swirling, spreading out, staining. Water moves peacefully as blue gradually absorbs the orange. White plastic bottle bobs on surface.
CUT TO:
EXT: GASTHAUS BIMPLITZ. SUNRISE
Same swimming pool blue as before, which slowly becomes early morning sky. Camera comes down over mountains set against that sky. Beautiful Alpine setting. Camera lowers more to the outside deck of Gasthaus Bimplitz. Jack & Willa, Flossmann, Lewis, Barr, other agents are around, having coffee. They all look tired and defeated. Lewis is standing apart from the others. He notices something out of view.
LEWIS
Here they come. Check it out.
All get up and come over. Down by the road, Djebeli and 2nd Saru man are being led by police to patrol car. Both are handcuffed, but Djebeli is smiling. When he sees the others watching he raises both hands in a salute. Gets in the car, drives off.
JACK
(o.s.)
What'll happen to them?
FLOSSMANN
Nothing will happen to them! They are diplomats. They walk on water.
LEWIS
They have immunity. They'll be scolded by the police and deported. There'll be an official protest to the Saruvian Ambassador. Maybe he'll be called home for consultation. Blah blah bullshit.
FLOSSMANN
(angry)
Nothing!
BARR
Nothing.
FLOSSMANN
They have destroyed the entire water supply of Vienna! But nothing will happen to them.
LEWIS
(ironic)
Diplomatic Immunity.
FLOSSMANN
(gives the finger to the gods)
They're criminals. They should be punished!
BARR
This is nothing. Remember what happened in London a few years ago? The Libyans started shooting at people on the street from inside their embassy. They killed a police woman. What happened to them? Nothing. They had immunity.
LEWIS
As usual.
BARR
As usual.
Silence as they watch the police car drive away.
BARR
It's beautiful here. The air smells so clean. It would be nice to come up for a weekend and just take it easy--
Another agent emerges from inside the gasthaus, excited.
AGENT
Come inside. You've gotta see this. It's on the news.
BARR
(moving)
What now?
AGENT
(shocked, excited)
Oh, you're not going to believe this one!
CUT TO:
INT: TV STUDIO
ANNOUNCER reading news. As he continues, different filmed reports are flashed on large screen behind him. Their content is parallel to what he is reporting.
ANNOUNCER
Experts from the World Health Organization report they are in constant contact with the affected countries and will have a statement for the press within hours. And now for a recap of the headlines: It has been reported in seventeen separate countries that an outbreak of a mysterious new disease has suddenly appeared. The symptoms in each case are identical....
As he speaks, pictures are flashed on screen of people in different nations, recognizable by their skin color or national costumes, all with Pinocchio noses.
CUT TO:
INT: GASTHAUS BIMPLITZ
Jack and Willa watching TV in gasthaus with others. The two look dumbstruck. Turning to Jack, Willa says
WILLA
(astonished)
They did it everywhere! Not just Vienna. They polluted the whole world. That was Cthulu's plan all along. Give it to everyone at once!
JACK
(nodding)
That's why Sadr was so willing to tell us on the bridge. He knew that even if we stopped Djebeli here, they'd be doing it everywhere else. They nuked the whole world at once!
CUT TO:
INT: TV STUDIO
Announcer continues
ANNOUNCER
Because of the identical symptoms, they are calling the disease "Pinocchio's Syndrome." It is sure to be a major topic of conversation at today's meeting of the United Nations in Vienna where all of the world's leaders have gathered...
FADE OUT
SCREEN READS "SIX MONTHS LATER"
INT: JACK'S OFFICE. DAY
In an elegantly furnished office, Jack and Willa sit side by side, staring at a drawing on the table. All around the room are posters for "World Wildlife Fund", "Greenpeace," "Amnesty International"...
JACK
I don't like it.
WILLA
Why?
JACK
Because it doesn't touch me. If I saw it on the street, I'd walk right by. The whole point of this campaign is to tell people to stop killing sweet little animals. If you show me a picture of a skinned corpse, I don't connect it with a sweet little animal. I think of a butcher shop.
WILLA
But how else are we going to do it? Obviously we can't lie and exaggerate it. This is what an animal looks like after it's been slaughtered. It's a terrible, true picture. People are finally getting used to the
WILLA
(cont.)
truth now. Since we can't lie anymore, we have to see the truth and learn to deal with it.
JACK
(shouting)
Deal with it?! Are you nuts?
Jumps up, grabs her by the hand and drags her over to the window.
JACK
Are you out of your mind? For six months the whole world's been forced to tell the truth. But look down there and tell me how well we're adapting to it. You think it's any different in Timbuktu? Look and see how well people are accepting the fact, the absolutely fixed and unchangeable fact that for the rest of our lives, we have to tell the truth every minute of every day. Forever and ever. Amen.
As he speaks, camera moves by them and looks out the window. It starts in the sky, then slowly moves down to the street. Down there the city is bustling-- people walking, talking, cars moving... But everywhere, on at least fifty percent of the faces, we see the same thing-- the Pinocchio nose. People talking have it, couples walking down the street have it, taxi drivers talking over their shoulders, maybe even a dog or two as well...
FADE OUT
INT: OVAL OFFICE, WHITE HOUSE. DAY
PRESIDENT & 2 ADVISORS are in discussion. Prez is upset and pacing the room.
PRESIDENT
So tell me, gentlemen, how the hell am I going to get this one by the American people? How do I tell them we're going to take several hundred million dollars originally earmarked for education and use it to build more weapons instead? I can't really tell them that, can I? But I can't not tell them either or else--
Points to his nose and pantomimes how it would grow. The others shake or nod their heads ruefully. When no one says anything, he mutters to himself
PRESIDENT
The good old days are gone! Ever since good old Cthulu waved his magic wand across the whole world, being President isn't much fun any more.
Side door opens and GENERAL DUDZINSKA rushes in, surprising the whole room.
PRESIDENT
(annoyed)
What is it, General?
GENERAL
(excited)
I'm sorry to interrupt, Mr. President, but we've found it! We found the cure!
Big commotion. General opens bag he's carrying and takes out bag of pumpkin seeds and liter bottle of Coca Cola.
PRESIDENT
Dudzinska, you've been telling me for six months that you found the cure! You've given me pills, shots in the ass, aerobic therapy... Whatever the hell your idiots come up with, I get it. But nothing ever works. Nothing!
General holds up a finger for the President to wait. He opens the bag of pumpkin seeds.
GENERAL
Pumpkin seeds. Buy 'em anywhere for a buck.
But you only need seven. Supposed to be good for the prostate too!
Eats a handful. Everyone waits impatiently while he chews, then swallows. President is about to speak, but General holds up his hand again. He takes a big swig of cola.
GENERAL
The American drink. Combine Coke and pumpkin seeds and Voila! Sometimes the answer is so simple. Watch this-- My name is Clark Gable. I am dead. Ever since I died I have been living on the planet Pluto.
Points to his nose. Nothing! Men wait expectantly, but nothing happens. As they realize nothing will, they get more and more excited, the President especially. After a good dramatic pause, General holds up the bottle and shouts triumphantly
GENERAL
It's the real thing!
CUT TO:
EXT: OUTDOORS. DAY
In a series of quick cuts, the universally recognizable scenes and sounds of a Coke ad-- Great-looking kids talking laughing, dancing, jumping... but always drinking or holding Coke bottles. The difference in each scene is before they take a gulp, each kid has a Pinocchio nose. As soon as they do drink, the nose shrinks and they're back to normal. At the end, the music and singing voices rise to a joyously magnificently crescendo singing
"COCA COLA IS IT!"