CarrollBlog 7.31

I have just heard that THE GHOST IN LOVE will definitely be published in Poland at the beginning of October. I will be there the week of October 22- 27 to promote the book. I will be in Warsaw, Olsztyn, Bialystok, and finish in Krakow at the Book Fair.

CarrollBlog 7.30

from Foreword to New Numbers
by Christopher Logue

CarrollBlog 7.28

We had a long dinner and talked about the sort of things you talk about with someone you have known for 15 years. It's been a long time since she was in a relationship and we talked about that too. As we were hugging goodbye at the end of the evening, she held on a while, then hugging harder said "Give me another second here. I miss a man's neck."
---------------------
terrific video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M405x2V_uXE&NR=1

CarrollBlog 7.27

My neighbor is a pleasant man but one of the worst drivers I have ever seen. The fact he has not died or killed someone in a car accident is astonishing. Stupidly I once accepted a lift from him. By the time we reached the destination I had aged six months. Reckless, obnoxious, dangerous, he drove as if he was on fire and there were no other cars on the road. Today I saw him speeding down a busy street and without a second's pause, blow through a traffic light that was changing to red. Not long ago I asked his son if Dad had ever been in an accident. No, never.

I know perhaps five genuinely bad people. You know what I'm talking about-- there's no need to elaborate. The poet Diane Wakoski has a collection called "Dancing on the Grave of a Son of a Bitch" and these five people fit that description perfectly. When they're dead the world will be a better place. However none of them (as far as I can see) have bad lives and at least two are very successful and seemingly happy. In other words, from the outside none of these creeps has ever had an "accident" either.

CarrollBlog 7.26

I have a beautiful lamp over my desk that I bought years ago. The other day it broke and I took it to a nearby lamp store to be fixed. The owner was a very hip arrogant guy. He looked the lamp over and all but spit out the words "That's the old model." As if I'd brought a mutt with shit on its feet into his store. "Yes, so what? It looks identical to the ones you're selling over there. Can you fix it?" All around us were the company's latest models. Several on display looked like mine only they were today's and not yesterday's. As if he couldn't think of anything else to say, he repeated "But it's *old.* That lamp is probably fifteen years old." From the back of the store another man emerged who I later learned was the repair guy. He looked at my lamp and nodded. "It's old, but that means he bought it when that model first came out. This man was way ahead of his time. Cutting edge." He looked at me and fought back a smile, which told me everything about his relationship with his employer. The boss frowned and suddenly walked away, leaving the two of us to work out the details. As I was leaving the store a few minutes later, I noticed the boss was looking at me-- Mr. Cutting Edge.
-----------------------
IT wrote in:
" I had a similar experience at a locksmith's shop with an antique hasp lock I'd inherited from my grandfather.
It's always interesting how the 'boss' in retail goods almost never understands that maybe you actually LIKED the old one, simply because it's the one with which you have a personal history. But there's always somebody in the back who gets it and says 'Hey, if you wanna spend the money? I can fix it' with a warm smile."

CarrollBlog 7.25

Someone wrote in and said they had bought one of my books for a penny. That really made me smile. What on earth can you purchase these days for one penny? And whether you end up liking the book or not, buying it for a single cent has got to be one of the greatest bargains still around. Reading that reminded me how much fun it is to poke around in used book stores and yard sales, looking for the unknown or unknown treasures. The first collection of Charles Bukowski's poetry I found cost ten cents in a used book store. I took it off the shelf (who's this guy?), had a quick look inside and froze. My eyes popped out of my head as I read poem after poem, the likes of which my 20 year old self had never seen before, much less dreamed could exist. Ten cents. I'm told that a pack of twenty cigarettes in some American cities now costs eight dollars. One cig= forty cents. Four times more than that Bukowski bouquet. Robertson Davies' FIFTH BUSINESS was twenty five cents in a box of books at a yard sale. If someone were to ask what five books have influenced me most as a writer, FIFTH BUSINESS would be on that list. Twenty five cents. Everyone wants to be paid and paid well for what they do. But there is also something very nice about knowing your work is available to the searching eye for one penny.
-------------------
ZD wrote in:
"i used to volunteer to sell used books at a library for about 10 cents or even a quarter. it was the best job i ever had. if money never mattered, i would do that forever. i was one of the only young people to work the shop. everyone else there was a lot older. 60's, 70's older. i was 17 at the time. and i remember there was this old woman who used to come in every sunday, see me, and say the same speech about how great it was that i was taking time out of my schedule to do this.

the most memorable part had to be my first day. about a week before i started, i happened to buy an expensive copy of 'watership down' from a big, corporate bookstore for about $17. i was wheeling out the cart of books for a quarter when low and behold i find a used copy of watership down mixed right in there."

CarrollBlog 7.24

The Clasp
by Sharon Olds

CarrollBlog 7.23

Yesterday I was talking with someone about motorcycles. They really knew their stuff and it was interesting to hear about that world from an expert. Along the way I casually asked if he had ever read ZEN AND THE ART OF MOTORCYCLE MAINTENANCE. He smiled ironically, as if I had to be kidding with that strange title. No, he'd never even heard of it. Something inside me immediately lit up. For the next few minutes I described what that wonderful book was about, saying again and again he really had to get a copy asap. The experience reawakened something inside me that's been sleeping a long time. I didn't realize it till then-- that crazy reader's enthusiasm you get when you've read a book you want the whole world to read immediately. I used to have it all the time when I was younger, especially when I was in colllege and books were needed and ingested like air. But not so much in recent years. The last book I recommended with such zealous fervor was Gregory Roberts' SHANTARAM but that was a few years ago. At the heart of our matter as human beings, really the best thing of all is passion. Passion for another person, passion for a job, a cause, even passion for a book. Perhaps that's what IT is all about-- our Purpose: trying to furnish your life with so many different kinds of passion that everywhere in it there is something that fills you to bursting and makes you want to tell the whole world about it.
-------------------------
"We act as though comfort and luxury were the chief requirements of life, when all that we need to make us really happy is something to be enthusiastic about."
Charles Kingsley
--------------------------
"I probably have more female friends than any man I've ever met. What I like about them is that almost always they're generally mentally tougher, and they're better listeners, and they're more capable of surviving things. And most of the women that I like have a haunted quality - they're sort of like women who live in a haunted house all by themselves."

CarrollBlog 7.22

We were talking about how different mens' and womens' perceptions of physical beauty is, especially when it comes to members of our own sex. I said it took me years to finally realize never to trust a woman when she says another woman is beautiful. WAIT UNTIL YOU SEE HER FOR YOURSELF. I don't know if it's because of a different way of perceiving things, or simply that men and women respond to different qualities. Generally speaking, I trust womens' words and insights much more than I do mens' for a variety of reasons. But when it comes to THIS subject, forget it.
---------------------------------------------------------
"What else should our lives be but a continual series of beginnings, of painful settings out into the unknown, pushing off from the edges of consciousness into the mystery of what we have not yet become."

CarrollBlog 7.21

Tattoo
by Ted Kooser

CarrollBlog 7.20

I was watching boxing on TV the other night. Two huge brutes were pounding away at each other. The commentator-- British of course-- said "These fighters are both so scary looking that if you put metal bolts in their necks, the villagers would be chasing them with pitchforks."
-----------------------
Speaking of Frankenstein, someone sent me a wonderful black and white photo that was taken on the set of the original film. In the pic Boris Karloff in full monster makeup is drinking a cup of tea with Colin Clive, the actor who played the mad doctor. In one hand Karloff is holding an elegant white cup and in the other a burning cigarette. The monster and the doctor look happily immersed in both their break and conversation.
------------------------
and for something completely different:

CarrollBlog 7.19

The Cold Hill Side
by Rachel Hadas

As months and years accumulate,
I miss you more and more.
Forgetting where I put the key,
I sometimes find a door

CarrollBlog 7.18

One of the most famous children's books in America is Maurice Sendak's WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE. The story, in short, is about a very bad little boy named Max who is sent to bed without dinner one night because he's been so naughty. But as soon as he gets to his room, The Wild Things-- wonderful monsters of all shapes and sizes-- appear and they play happily together till morning. Max is delighted and has no fear of them. He's a brave little guy. Sendak said readers often ask what he thinks happened to Max when he grew up. One night the author was at a dinner party in New York and seated next to the actress Sigourney Weaver. It turned out the glamorous Weaver was a big fan of his work and they chatted throughout the meal. Later she pointed to a man sitting across the table. She said that was her husband and one of the reasons why she fell in love with him was he reminded her so much of Max in WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE. Delighted, Sendak said finally he knew what happened to his famous character. That's what he tells everyone who now asks-- Max grew up and married Sigourney Weaver.

CarrollBlog 7.17

We were talking about a couple that recently broke up but no one knows why-- They've been together a long time and on the surface were a happy, good match.
He looked at his watch and then at me. 'Maybe it was the secret or the monster that broke them up.'
He believes you can never really know a person unless 1. you have learned at least one of their deepest secrets, and 2. seen the monster they keep inside. That monster only surfaces either when we are genuinely out of control, or we trust someone enough so that we feel we can let our guard down and show them our true emotion.

CarrollBlog 7.16

HAVING CHILDREN
by Barbara Tanner Angell

CarrollBlog 7.15

Recently a very old school friend got in touch via this website and we've been catching up. Who's done what, who's dead, who's fallen off the radar screen, who surprised everyone by pulling a rabbit out of their life's hat and become a success. The reason he made contact was to invite me to a school reunion this summer, but reunions have never interested me. I like my memories as they are, like thousand year old insects preserved whole in amber. Old loves and grudges, the way things smelled that day out on the boat, or the strong metallic taste of fear in the mouth when we got caught stealing. Maybe it wasn't that way at all. Maybe these memories are entirely wrong and I have been distorting them for decades. But most antique dealers will tell you never to clean up or polish old metal because the patina that has built up on the surface over the years greatly enhances the look of the piece. So too with many memories, I believe.
____________________

CarrollBlog 7.14

'In the beginning of their relationship, both proceeded as if they had entered a very dark room and were sliding their hands hesitantly up and down all the walls, feeling for a light switch while at the same time afraid that they might touch something sharp or dangerous. But from the minute they met, there was absolutely no game playing between them because they had had enough of that in their lives. They were eager to get to the heart of this matter. Both wanted to reach the point as soon as possible where sharing silence was just as good as sharing their life stories.

'They were both neat. They both wanted to laugh often. One of them liked sex more than the other but they worked that out. All in all, the ease with which they fit into each other's lives made them both skeptical. It is not supposed to be this way; it is never this easy. Where are the difficulties? One night while eating large bowls of two dollar rahmen soup Jane had microwaved for them, she put hers down and said apropos to nothing 'Maybe it just IS and I am not going to worry about it anymore, you know? Maybe we are just lucky this time. Maybe there really is such a thing as luck. I never believed it before, but maybe there is.'

CarrollBlog 7.13

In Vienna late at night, there are very few places still open where you can get something to eat. By default, hot dog stands are often crowded because most of them serve 24/7. That means at three AM you're likely to see an interesting array of people hanging around them, especially the stands in the center of town where most of the bars and night life is. German/Austrian wurst is the best in the world and there is something unique about eating a bratwurst or frankfurter with slap-in-the-face sharp mustard in the middle of the night while standing at a high counter next to a bum or a drunk on one side of you, a couple dressed in a tuxedo and an evening gown on the other side. A few nights ago I was having a midnight snack with a pal who is a wurstelstand devotee. We were both eating something disgusting and wonderful called kasekrainer (big grilled sausage with cheese inside). We were chatting and didn't notice our neighbors. Suddenly a stentorian, very formal voice said "That was absolutely delicious, as always. You have the best wurst in the world here! I am always happy to return!" Everyone at the stand looked and saw a very short old man dressed in a three piece suit, Trilby hat, and a walking stick addressing the woman behind the counter. "Superb!" he thundered. She smiled sort of, not really knowing if he was serious or not. The man turned to the person nearest him and demanded to know "Isn't this a great wurstelstand?" All of us, every single one there, nodded.
---------------
from ON and NG. Be sure to read the description of how the photo was taken:

CarrollBlog 7.12

"I know what I have given you. I do not know what you have received."

CarrollBlog 7.11

Very early in the morning a woman is standing in front of a store on the big shopping street, waiting. I know who she is and what she's waiting for but I am too far away to help. A bum slouches toward her with his head down. She goes over to him and speaks. He looks up while she asks him to help. She is very short and every day must unlock the door to her store. The problem is the door has two locks-- one at the very top, one at the bottom. She is too small to reach the one at the top and must always ask a passerby to take the key and unlock it for her. She's asked me several times and is always very pleasant about it. Moving towards them now I watch the bum turn the key up top and then hand it back to the woman. She smiles and thanks him profusely. He walks away towards me smiling and moving much differently than minutes before-- with purpose now, a man who's asked to do things, a man who deserves thanks.

CarrollBlog 7.10

This is Just to Say
by William Carlos Williams

CarrollBlog 7.9

"She believed it is almost always something small or unexpected that ends a relationship. By and large the hammer blow does not come from things like finding out your partner has been unfaithful, or that they become a monster behind closed doors. Those revelations may knock you to your knees, but it is actually seeing the secret snapshot of them together with the other person, both looking so happy, so completely stoned on love or sex, that finishes it. Or the small wicked smile on their face after they have been intentionally cruel to you. The end, like God, is in the details."

CarrollBlog 7.8

The man coming out of the supermarket is so tough and fearsome looking that he could easily be an extra from any of the MAD MAX films. His head is shaved to the bone, nose pierced, Oakley wrap around sunglasses, his upper body, covered in a "Gold's Gym' wife beater t-shirt, is perfectly toned and ripped from years of lifting serious weights, tattoos.. the whole package. It takes some seconds to take in and digest his impressive picture. Only then do I look to see what he's bought in the market. In one hand is a giant size carton of chocolate milk and in the other a small box of animal crackers.

CarrollBlog 7.7

The old woman walks to the counter and orders an espresso. As soon as the waitress turns to get it, the woman starts reaching into her purse for her wallet. But her hands are shaking so badly that she can barely lift it out of the bag. By the time she has it up to the counter, the waitress has brought the coffee. The woman slowly-slowly opens the wallet and change purse inside. Hands still shaking, she offers the wallet to the waitress and asks her to take out the cost of the drink. The waitress smiles and nods. She holds up each coin so the woman can see what she is taking. When she is done, the woman thanks her. Then the two of them wink at each other. It is an almost identical wink, full of understanding and trust. As if they have been doing this same hand dance together for years.

CarrollBlog 7.6

After the dust had cleared at the end of their affair, clarity replaced the lies and exaggeration that come when something important is finished but we don't want to admit it yet. When the honesty returned, he recognized that even at its best, their relationship had been like the mediocre free shampoo available in hotel rooms. Thin and unsatisfying, it smells both sweet but weird. You can never get a good lather from it, nor do you feel like your hair is really clean after using it.
------------------
One of life's real disappointments is discovering most people look better clothed than naked.
------------------
Coincidentally, two friends wrote in describing signs they saw homeless people holding as they stood on the sidewalk.

CarrollBlog 7.5

"I believe that when you're making a mix tape or CD, you're making history. You ransack the vaults, you haul off all the junk you can carry, and you rewire all your ill-gotten loot into something new. You go through an artist's entire career, zero in on that one moment that makes you want to jump and dance and smoke bats and bite the heads off drugs. And then you play that moment over and over.

CarrollBlog 7.4

In a recent novel I had two characters answer the following questions in all seriousness. DW wrote in asking that the questions be repeated here.

CarrollBlog 7.3

I asked if she ever did a brave thing that backfired. Without hesitating, the young woman said she went to a club with some friends. She was introduced to a man who was so good looking that she just stared at him all night. "I'm normally a very shy person and never *ever* make the first move. But this guy was so special that I finally couldn't stand it anymore. I went over and as if I were another person, asked if he'd like to go into the bathroom with me. He looked shocked but said yes. So we went there and had a big make out session but nothing more-- just that. He's my boyfriend now. But as long as we've been together, he keeps asking how many other guys in my past I invited into the toilet of a club to make out. I swear to God he was the only one, but I know he doesn't believe me. It really gets on my nerves that he doesn't trust what I say."
---------------
On another note, there's a section on Yahoo.com where people can write in with questions and have them answered by readers. Someone asked when was the first time New York City was called "Gotham" and why (which turns out to be 1807 in a satirical essay by Washington Irving). However this one guy's very serious and detailed response was the name GOTHAM first appeared in the comic strip BATMAN because the writers didn't want to call it New York and get sued by the city.

CarrollBlog 7.2

In the hillside town where the novelist Romain Rolland lived and died is a church that contains the bones (or so they say) of Mary Magdalene. The church is giant and ominous but the town is beautiful. On one of the narrow streets leading up to the church is a small store selling photographs and postcards of the town, the church, other things. They are very good, so I buy several postcard size prints. The man behind the counter says he took all of the pictures for sale there. After adding up the cost, he very carefully and with an end flourish autographs each one I have chosen to buy. That makes me smile. It's such a universal desire to want to put our names, our marks, on the things we create.
----------------
http://tinyurl.com/3a4lem

CarrollBlog 7.1

Postcards
by Wendy Cope