CarrollBlog

My beloved pal AP is a paramedic. I asked her to tell me a good story from her job.

It was my very first clinical ride along. I was in medical school and as a student you have to ride with a crew and practice all you have learned on real patients. My preceptor was a real asshole but he was smart, real smart. All of the students wanted to be at his station even with his God complex. The only time it really sucked being with him was when we got called out in the middle of the night because this guy had no patience with his patients when he was tired. So, the alarm goes off at like 3:00 in the morning and the dispatcher gives us the usually vague, Caller relates his wife does not feel well. We all get up and go to the ambulance. My preceptor is bitching the whole way to the call. When we pull up, we open the back doors to get the stretcher and suddenly hear the sound of a really big bird. Like a macaw or one of those big white Cockatoos or something. It was so hideously loud and irritating because it just would not stop. Squawk, squawk, squawk. Then a little old man comes out of the house and walks up to meet us. He starts talking, saying something about his wife, but we cannot even hear him because his bird is just squawking away. My preceptor takes this guy by the hand, walks him over to the ambulance, helps him into the back of the truck and says, Sir, with all due respect, it is very late right now, and I want to help you, but your bird is really loud. I need you to go in your house and find a way to make it shut up. The old man says, But I do not have a bird. And my preceptor asks, Then what kind of animal is making that horrible noise? The man says, That is my wife; she is not breathing very good. But it is quiet now. She must be feeling better.
And all of us run for the front door.

I worked my first respiratory code that night. It was the first time I put a tube down someone's throat.