Caught flatfooted by a ripping summer rainstorm on the way home, I saw:

4 young Oriental women running, all of them holding white magazines over their heads in exactly the same way and all in their left hands.

2 old women standing next to each other in a doorway looking dubiously at the sky. Both of them were wearing identical transparent rubber rain hats. The kind that close when you pull on either end and can then be folded into a pocket. I haven't seen that kind of rain hat in years.

One young woman completely drenched but smiling as she pedalled slowly by on a yellow bicycle.

One businessman running, cursing, holding an expensive leather briefcase over his head in a futile attempt to stay dry.

The world is divided between those who enjoy the rain when they get caught by it, and those who angrily battle the wet every inch of the way.

"Every man is a story and has an end to fashion, and sometimes the smallest leaning into the light can be enough."

Paul Wilson

The great faces people make when they're talking on the telephone that the person on the other end of the line will never see.

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In Europe one of the differences between men and women and the now- ubiquitous mobile phone is in general, men carry them in their hands more when they're walking down the street. It's almost as if the object were a male fashion accessory. Especially if it's the coolest, latest model or an expensive one-- "Look at what I've got!"
In contrast, women almost never have a phone in their hand unless they are using it, even if they are not carrying a purse. And from what I can see, women actually use these phones a lot more than men do.
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I'm beginning to think that the ringtone(s) a person chooses to use on their mobile phone says a lot about their character, unfortunately.

For decades my uncle owned a very prestigious men's store in Beverly Hills, California. As a result, many of his friends were movie stars. Of all his stories about them, this is my favorite:

He and Clark Gable used to play golf together regularly. One day they were on a course where one of the holes ran parallel to a public road. When they reached that hole, a car stopped nearby and the female driver asked my uncle for directions. He didn't know the answer to her question, so he casually asked his partner if he did. Gable was putting so his back was turned to them. After taking his shot, he turned and ambled over to the car. Leaning on the passenger's side door, he stuck his head in the window and began rattling off directions. When the woman realized who was talking, her mouth fell open and then, according to family legend, she passed out.

"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance."

Confucius

I pass two men on the street. One of them is saying, "The doctor said it's not the AIDS, it's that my blood is too thin--"

Walking through the park this morning on the way to the bank, I bumped into a woman I often meet there because we walk our dogs at the same times of the day. On seeing me, her eyes jumped all around searching my immediate area. Then the first thing she said was "Where's Jack?" I smiled and told her he was home asleep. Afterwards I realized most of the time we "know" people by the dogs they walk, the clothes they wear, the jobs they have, etcetera. Many policemen are members of the gym I use. I know these guys in their sneakers and scruffy workout clothes, pumping iron and chatting/laughing with their friends. But now and then I bump into them out on the streets in their uniforms, expressionless, all cop-serious. The experience is always slightly jarring. When I was teaching, whenever I met my students outside of school downtown or in a cafe, they would frequently get this "What are YOU doing here?" look in their eye, as if teachers didn't have a life outside the classroom. That is a teacher, not a guy in a cafe. That is a guy from the gym, not a cop. I am the man with the bullterrier. Ergo, if I meet this woman without a dog, I am not really me.

a variation on a recent quote:

"If you really want to do something, no one can stop you. If you don't really want to do something, no one can help you."

Dave Sim

(thanks Coppervale)

in a letter to someone recovering from major surgery:

"Look for a different kind of toughness in yourself now. Like dogs that always pee on the same places, we keep going back to the same strengths (and weaknesses) in our selves whenever we're faced with and trying to overcome new problems. But you are not the same person you were pre-illness, pre-operation. You're someone else now with different strengths and weaknesses that resulted from that horrible experience. Whether you recognize it or not, this new you needs a new, realigned perspective to continue. If for some reason a person can't walk down stairs anymore, rather than waste their energy being fearful of this new limitation, better to spend that energy looking for an elevator. The same fundamental you still exists and always will, but parts have changed or shifted in profound ways that you must now discover and work from. Those old tried and true methods that got you through life in the past are no longer applicable.You should try to discard them, or at least give them less emphasis. Once you recognize and accept that, I think you'll be on your way to new strength.

A couple I know were having domestic trouble. Over lunch with
the man, I carefully asked what the problem was.
He said only "Vices, Crisis, Pisces."

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I walk past a restaurant which is advertising today's special on a chalkboard in front of the place: "Spare Rips"

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Title for a short story -- "Lying Myself to Sleep"

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In the street in front of the gay bar is a black and red bottle of cologne
(I assume) labeled simply "Man Smell." I imagine some guy splashing it
on moments before he went in, looking for the heart of Saturday night.

"If you want something badly enough, you make arrangements.
If you don't want it badly enough, you make excuses."

Hanif Kureishi

"It is never too late to be what you might have been."

Geoge Eliot

"Men go abroad to wonder at the heights of mountains, at the huge waves of the sea, at the long courses of the rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motions of the stars: and they pass by themselves without wondering."

St. Augustine

(thanks to DL for this one)

"Be not bold, be fucking BOLD. Every time you meet someone, make a fucking impression. Make them think you're the hottest shit in the world. Make them think they're gonna lose their job if they don't give you one. Look 'em in the eye, and never look away. Be confident and calm, be fucking bold."

James Frey, MY FRIEND LEONARD

I was reading the latest issue of MEN'S JOURNAL magazine. The lead article was "100 Things To Do Before You Die." On the list were things like climb Mt. Everest, parachute from a plane, hand feed a shark, etcetera. I skimmed the other things they suggested should be on everyone's list. I had no desire to do even one of them. So then I thought is there anything I'd like to do before I die that I haven't done yet? Hypothetically if someone is living fully, they're doing what matters (or is important) to them whenever and however they can. There's something pathetic about having to make lists of tasks to do before you die so you can be sure that by doing them, you will have really "lived." The Japanese say "live every day as if your hair was on fire" and within realistic bounds, that sounds just about right. Most of the time we know almost as soon as a situation arises whether we will regret not doing it afterwards or not if we say no. We also know most of the time that despite the many fearful, well behaved inner voices telling us not to do something, that we should ignore those voices and just go ahead and do it. Because when we do it and it works, it makes us bigger and life richer. If it fails, we hurt for a while but then we heal and move on. You don't need to climb Mt. Everest to have led a fulfilled life. You only have to have the courage, and usually it is only small courage, to say yes. Say yes and do something when your first, second and third instincts may be to say no because that frightens me.

A nice one in an e-mail from A.P.--

"Here’s my cool story of the day.

I was at Ruby Tuesday’s having lunch with my son.

Nearby, at another table was an elderly couple. The man was a World War II vet, as was clearly evident by the outfit that he was wearing (it looked as if they had come from the local lodge or some similar place). Clearly, they had been together for many lifetimes, still enjoyed one another, and appeared to be very much in love. I watched them for a long time.

I approached their server and asked her to put their check on my bill. She asked me why; I told her it didn’t matter why and asked her to do it, please. She did.

As the couple was leaving, they approached my table and asked why I had picked up their check. I told the man I just wanted to do something nice for them to thank him for his time in the service and for fighting for our country. A small thing to let him know that I appreciate his commitment to our freedom. He saw my cane and asked if I was in the service. No, I said and Nikko and I explained to them my situation, as they sat with us and had coffee. During my story, the woman began to cry. Her husband leaned over and kissed her tears (an old man, so sweet!). I said to them that that was the kind of love I’d like to find one day… someone who will spend a lifetime kissing away my tears. No, he said, this is my bride of just three weeks. We found each other late and are trying to make up for lost time."

Passing a typical Viennese candy store, the old fashioned kind that sells just about every possible variety of sweetie on the planet, I see an old woman slowly pulling a dilapidated metal cart on wheels behind her. She stops in the doorway of the shop to catch her breath before going in. The owner, another
old woman, comes out and greets her warmly. "Frau Schmidt, are you coming to see me?"
"Yes."
"Wonderful. Then come in and bring your Mercedes with you."

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In the waiting room of the radiology clinic where one goes to have MRI or CAT scans done, a strikingly attractive young couple are sitting side by side. It's hard to say who is more beautiful-- the woman or the man. They are holding hands tightly and staring at the floor.
Both of them look terrified.

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An Italian phrase I just learned. Beautiful, as always.

con dolcezza

to do something with sweetness

just saying it out loud makes the mouth purr

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In a recent email, my friend Olga said,
"A man without a sense of humor is like a woman without breasts."

"If you ask me what I came into this world to do, I will tell you: I came to live out loud."

Emile Zola

Sometimes when you're walking towards a stranger, you see their younger face first. The face they had years ago. As you get nearer and see more specific detail, the face they possess now comes into focus and takes over. So that's what this woman looked like when she was twenty. As she approaches, the more 40 she looks. She becomes who she is now. I guess distance makes the eyes grow fonder.

A bunch of people have written in and asked where they could see the illustration Ryder Carroll did for my story "The Bum Who Smelled Like a Sandwich" when it ran in Filter Magazine. Have a look for yourself. It's under illustrations at www.rydercarroll.com

Sitting on the airplane diagonally in front of me was the young man who used a wheelchair. He had been taken onto the plane earlier and was waiting there alone when the rest of us boarded. Whenever a stewardess passed and offered him something-- a drink or a meal-- he smiled warmly at them but said no. Throughout the flight he kept picking up one leg and then the other, moving each of them a little to the left or the right. Small adjustments. I couldn't really understand why he kept doing this so I paid closer attention. Eventually it became obvious that if he left them too long in one position, his legs started to tremble. That's when he would repeat the process of moving them around. The look on his face was a kind of mild exasperation more than anything else. As if he were accompanied by two unruly children who simply could not sit still in their seats for very long before they started fidgeting again.

"We humans have two great problems: the first is knowing when to begin, the second is knowing when to stop."

"At every moment of our lives, we all have one foot in a fairy tale and the other in the abyss..."

Paolo Coelho

Walking through the Stadtpark on a beautiful first day of June. Out of the corner of my eye I see a very good looking woman standing behind a baby stroller. Looking again, I realize she is with three other women, all of them there with young children in strollers. My eyes scan down to the beautiful woman's child. It is instantly obvious that it is microcephalic. Startled, I look at the children in the other three carriages. Every one of them is severely handicapped. I feel instantly ashamed for having ogled the beautiful mother. Then I think I'm an idiot for thinking like that. Then I don't know what to think. All of this and more is flashing through my mind as I walk away from them, wanting to look back again for all the wrong reasons.

In Thailand when something very bad happens and a person is apt to lose all perspective, they are told "Jai yen yen" which translates "Keep a cool, cool heart."